From The Porch

Managing Business Owner Expectations During Exit Planning

Thu, 16 Jan 2025 15:33:19 GMT

The success of a business exit hinges not on the numbers alone but on the alignment of expectations, values, and vision for what comes next.

Retirement can be a challenging transition for business owners. After years of building, managing, and leading their companies, stepping away often brings a mix of emotions, including uncertainty, anxiety, and even fear. As an advisor, your role is to guide clients through this significant life change, helping them reframe retirement not as an ending but as a new chapter filled with possibilities.

Managing client expectations involves helping them understand that retirement isn’t just about leaving behind their business. It’s about opening the door to opportunities they may have never explored. The key to a successful retirement is recognizing and embracing these opportunities, whether they are personal, professional, or philanthropic.

In this white paper, we will explore how to manage client expectations and highlight some of the exciting opportunities available in retirement. By shifting their focus from what they are leaving behind to what lies ahead, you can help your clients create a fulfilling and purpose-driven retirement.

Managing Client Expectations

When a client enters the retirement phase, they may initially focus on the loss of routine, income, or status that comes with exiting their business. As their advisor, your job is to help them shift their perspective. Encourage them to see retirement as a time of opportunity, where they can explore passions, deepen relationships, and continue to make a meaningful impact.

Key Strategies for Managing Expectations:

Reframe Retirement as a New Beginning
Help your clients view retirement as a chance to pursue new goals and dreams. This shift in mindset can reduce anxiety and build excitement for the future.
Create a Vision for Post-Retirement Life
Work with clients to create a vision for their retirement, focusing on personal fulfillment, community involvement, and lifelong learning. This will provide direction and purpose.
Set Realistic Financial and Lifestyle Expectations
Many clients worry about financial stability in retirement. Develop a solid financial plan that accounts for their desired lifestyle, ensuring they feel secure in their decisions.
Identify Personal Values and Passions
Retirement offers the chance to reconnect with personal values and passions. Encourage clients to explore hobbies, travel, or volunteer work that aligns with their core beliefs.
Highlight the Benefits of Flexibility and Freedom
Retirement allows for a more flexible schedule. Help clients see the freedom in managing their own time, traveling, and pursuing new ventures without the constraints of their business.

Opportunities in Retirement

Retirement presents a wealth of opportunities. By highlighting the many ways clients can stay active, engaged, and purposeful, you can help them see the potential that retirement holds.

Below is a list of 20 opportunities for clients to explore during retirement:

Mentorship : Share years of experience by mentoring young entrepreneurs or professionals.
Philanthropy : Contribute to charitable causes through donations or volunteer work.
Board Membership : Serve on the board of directors for companies or nonprofits.
Consulting : Offer expertise to businesses in the same industry or new sectors.
Public Speaking : Engage in speaking engagements at industry events, schools, or conferences.
Writing a Book : Document business insights, personal experiences, or creative fiction.
Teaching : Become a guest lecturer or adjunct professor at universities or business schools.
Starting a New Business : Begin a smaller, passion-driven business or a part-time venture.
Volunteering : Give back to the community by volunteering with local organizations.
Travel : Explore new countries and cultures without the restrictions of a busy work schedule.
Learning New Skills : Take up new hobbies, such as learning a language, art, or an instrument.
Joining a Club : Get involved in social or professional clubs.
Pursuing Health and Fitness : Focus on physical health by engaging in regular exercise.
Spending Time with Family : Reconnect with family members, including grandchildren & children.
Gardening or Farming : Dedicate time to growing a garden or managing a small farm.
Investing in Startups : Use knowledge and capital to support emerging businesses.
Artistic Pursuits : Engage in artistic activities such as painting, photography, or sculpture.
Retirement Communities : Move to or visit active retirement communities to meet others.
Attending Lifelong Learning Programs : Enroll in adult education courses or workshops .
Hosting Events : Plan and host gatherings to stay engaged with a broad network.

Shaping a Retirement Vision

Each client’s retirement will look different. Some may want to focus on quiet reflection, while others thrive on staying actively involved in business or social ventures. Your role as an advisor is to help them build a retirement that reflects their unique goals and values.

Here are a few ways to help clients create a retirement vision:

Define Key Priorities
What does the client value most? Is it family, personal growth, or community involvement? Understanding their top priorities will help shape the direction of their retirement.
Align Opportunities with Values
Guide clients in selecting activities or projects that align with their core values. For example, a client passionate about education may enjoy mentoring or teaching.
Encourage Flexibility
Remind clients that retirement is fluid, and their goals may evolve. Encourage them to stay open to new possibilities as they explore different opportunities.

Conclusion

Helping clients manage their expectations about retirement is essential to ensuring they embrace this new phase of life with excitement and confidence. By reframing retirement as a time of opportunity and growth, you can alleviate concerns and inspire them to make the most of their post-career years.

The opportunities in retirement are vast, from mentorship and philanthropy to personal growth and relaxation. By guiding your clients toward a strategic, purpose-driven retirement plan, you ensure they see not just what they’re leaving behind, but the endless possibilities that lie ahead.

The Advisor’s Role in Easing Fear of Regret

Fri, 10 Jan 2025 19:41:55 GMT

"In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take." – Lewis Carroll

Advisor,

Your role in exit planning goes way beyond logistics. Your role is uniquely positioned to minimize the powerful, often paralyzing fear of regret. A well-designed, thoughtful exit strategy is the strongest tool to help clients avoid the painful “what-ifs” that can haunt them long after they step away.

When you help clients define their values, identify priorities, and craft a plan that honors their legacy, you eliminate ambiguity and give them confidence. A strategy that resonates with who they are at their core diminishes second-guessing and allows clients to exit with purpose and pride.

To truly ease regret, focus on clarity, alignment, and intentionality at every step. Help clients envision a future that excites them and secure their confidence in each decision. By being proactive and deeply attuned to their needs, you shift their focus from fear to anticipation.

A thoughtful exit strategy becomes their anchor, a solid foundation from which they can confidently transition, knowing they’ve made choices they won’t need to question.

Here are 3 practical steps you can take this week that will elevate your role in your clients' experience:

Facilitate a Legacy-Centered Conversation
Schedule a meeting with a client to explore their personal values, priorities, and vision for life post-exit. Use targeted questions to help them articulate what legacy they want to leave behind and how their decisions can reflect that. Document these insights to inform their exit strategy.

Create a Decision Alignment Checklist
Develop a simple framework or checklist that clients can use to evaluate whether their decisions align with their long-term goals and values. Share this tool with at least one client this week to help them approach their decisions with clarity and intentionality.

Design a Future Vision Workshop
Organize a session to help a client envision their ideal post-exit life. Use exercises like timeline mapping or visualization techniques to identify what excites them about the future. Translate this vision into actionable steps, ensuring their exit strategy reflects a path they are eager to pursue.

Let me know how it goes.

This Trips Up Most People - Brace Yourself

Tue, 17 Dec 2024 15:27:41 GMT

How to Finally Stop Hitting the Reset Button

on Your Life Strategy

You start with a plan. You feel the momentum building. The first few steps feel good, maybe even great. Then, like clockwork, you find yourself right back where you started. It’s frustrating, confusing, and honestly, exhausting.

Why does it keep happening? And how do you make progress that sticks this time?

Here’s the truth: real change doesn’t happen because you’ve found the perfect strategy. It happens because you finally stop flirting with progress and commit to what’s already within you.

Let’s get into it.

The Cycle That Keeps You Stuck

If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. You get fired up with a clear plan to change something—your career trajectory, health habits, relationships, or mindset. You feel determined, but that excitement fades when:

Life gets busy. Something urgent pulls your attention away.
Old habits kick in. You default to what’s easy or comfortable.
Results feel slow. Frustration creeps in, and doubt wins.

Then, you tell yourself you’ll “start fresh” later. Maybe Monday. Maybe next month. Maybe when life settles down. But let’s be real—later never comes.

Why? Because you’re running on willpower and motivation instead of something much stronger: commitment to the life you actually want.

Willpower Won’t Get You There

Willpower is a short-term fix. You can push through discomfort for a while, but eventually, it runs out. That’s when the old version of you sneaks back in.

Progress that lasts doesn’t happen when you “try harder.” It happens when you decide—no matter what—that you’re not going back to the way things were. This isn’t about perfection; it’s about a shift in identity.

Ask yourself:

Are you someone who’s just “trying” to change?
Or are you someone who’s done settling for less?

When you make that decision, everything starts to feel different.

Stop Waiting for the Right Time

Here’s the thing: the “right time” you’re waiting for doesn’t exist. Life will always be busy. Distractions will always show up. The question is: Will you keep letting them win?

Progress happens when you work with what’s real—your current circumstances, not the perfect scenario in your mind.

Got 10 minutes? Use them.
Feeling tired? Do one small thing instead of nothing.
Doubting yourself? Take action anyway.

The perfect time won’t show up. You have to show up—again and again—until it becomes who you are.

How to Finally Follow Through

Decide Who You Want to Be
Stop focusing on the outcome and start with identity. Do you want to be someone who keeps breaking promises to yourself? Or someone who does what you say you will? Decide.

Stop Relying on Motivation
Plan for the days when you won’t feel like it. Those moments are where change happens. Show up, even when it’s inconvenient. Especially when it’s inconvenient.

Make Your Actions Small, But Unmissable
Progress isn’t built on grand gestures—it’s built on consistency. Start ridiculously small. Five minutes of focus, one clear choice, one task completed. Do that every day, and momentum builds.

Track the Wins (Even the Tiny Ones)
Evidence builds belief. When you keep track of your wins—no matter how small—you remind yourself that progress is happening.

Hold Yourself to Your Word
Every time you break a promise to yourself, it chips away at your trust. Instead, make fewer promises, and keep every single one. Prove to yourself that you’re reliable.

Let’s Get Real

The version of you who keeps starting and stopping? That’s not who you really are. That’s just who you’ve been. But the only way to move forward is to stop letting that version of you drive the bus.

You’ve made progress before, which means you can do it again. But this time, stay in the game longer. Not because you feel like it, but because you’ve decided that’s who you are now.

Small steps, done daily, will get you where you want to go. Stop waiting to feel ready. Stop restarting. You already know what to do. Show up, take action, and let the momentum carry you.

No more resets. No more excuses. Just progress, one decision at a time.

The Perfect Exit (or not)

Fri, 13 Dec 2024 18:00:21 GMT

Is there a perfect exit?

Ah, “the perfect exit.” The shining beacon of unattainable bliss that every business owner dreams of. It’s the exit where the stars align, the world applauds, and every single decision is celebrated by employees, buyers, and competitors alike.

The departing owner, bathed in golden light, watches their business thrive under new leadership, perfectly aligned with their values, and destined to break all records. There are no hiccups, no regrets, and certainly no chance that anything will ever go awry.

But let’s face it: perfection in exit planning is as likely as unicorns showing up to negotiate your client’s sale contract.

As an advisor, it’s important to help clients reframe their exit expectations from “perfect” to “positive.” Here’s how to guide them away from perfectionism and toward a grounded, satisfying exit:

Emphasize the Journey, Not Just the Outcome
Remind clients that exits are complex by nature and that bumps along the way are normal. When they view the process as a journey, they’re less likely to feel let down by small challenges and more likely to appreciate the bigger picture.

Celebrate Progress and Successes
Help clients identify meaningful wins throughout the exit process, whether it’s finalizing a buyer, creating a strong transition plan, or feeling secure about their financial future. Celebrating small successes keeps them motivated and engaged.

Encourage Flexibility and Adaptability
Highlight that change is natural and doesn’t detract from their legacy. When clients understand that transition often requires adjustments, they’re more prepared to embrace change rather than resist it. Flexibility allows them to handle unexpected situations with confidence and grace.

Encourage a Post-Exit Vision Beyond Perfection
Work with clients to craft a realistic and fulfilling post-exit vision. This might include personal goals, family time, hobbies, or even community engagement. By focusing on the life they’re moving toward, they become less fixated on the idealized exit and more excited about their future.

Remind Them Perfection Is Overrated
Ultimately, the concept of a “perfect” exit is an illusion. Remind clients that it’s better to pursue a transition that reflects their values and goals than chase an unattainable ideal. Real fulfillment comes from meaningful choices, not flawless ones.

In the end, a successful exit is one that feels true to who the client is , not one that fits a mythical checklist of “perfect” outcomes. As their advisor, your guidance helps them let go of unrealistic expectations and embrace an authentic, rewarding exit. Because in the real world, perfection isn’t what brings peace—it’s knowing that the decision was made with intention, clarity, and confidence.

Detect Conflict Early

Wed, 04 Dec 2024 20:16:40 GMT

For The Advisor:

How To Detect Early Signs Of Conflict

For a smoother exit planning process

Conflict within families or stakeholder groups can quietly grow, damaging relationships and disrupting progress if left unchecked. Recognizing the early warning signs of conflict is key to addressing issues before they escalate into larger problems. This is particularly crucial when dealing with high-stakes situations like family businesses, succession planning, or shared financial decisions.

This blog explores common indicators of brewing conflict—from frequent miscommunications and subtle power struggles to reduced engagement and unmet expectations. By identifying the following signals and taking proactive steps, you as the advisor are in a better position to guide with healthier communication, realign priorities better, and maintain harmony within your client's organization and/or family.

Frequent Miscommunications
Notice if family members or stakeholders often misunderstand each other. Clarify roles and ensure clear communication to prevent conflict from building.

Avoidance of Key Conversations
Watch for clients avoiding difficult topics, such as succession or financial planning. Address these issues directly before they become bigger problems.

Increased Tension in Meetings
Sense the tone of meetings. If tension rises and conversations feel more combative, take action to diffuse it early.

Silent Disagreements
Look for body language or passive responses that indicate unspoken disagreements. Encourage open dialogue to resolve underlying concerns.

Unmet Expectations
If stakeholders express frustration over unmet expectations, this can signal brewing conflict. Help realign expectations and goals early on.

Competing Priorities
Recognize when family members have differing priorities for the business. Facilitate discussions to bring these priorities into alignment.

Reduced Engagement
Pay attention if a normally engaged stakeholder becomes withdrawn. This shift in behavior may point to dissatisfaction or unresolved issues.

Inconsistent Decision-Making
If decisions are delayed or repeatedly revisited, it may indicate internal conflict. Guide the group toward a more cohesive decision-making process.

Subtle Power Struggles
Spot subtle signs of competition for influence or control within the family or business. Address these power dynamics before they escalate into full-blown conflict.

Emotional Reactions
Watch for disproportionate emotional responses to routine discussions. These reactions often signal deeper unresolved issues that need attention.

Addressing conflict early is essential to maintaining healthy relationships and achieving shared goals. Recognize the warning signs—like miscommunications, avoidance, or unmet expectations—and step in before tensions escalate.

Proactive communication, clear roles, and facilitated discussions help resolve issues. And that helps to ensure that collaboration and trust remain intact. Early intervention is always more effective than managing the fallout of unchecked conflict.

How do YOU handle early warning signs of conflict?

A Tale About Life Beyond The Retirement Date

Wed, 27 Nov 2024 15:55:45 GMT

The Tale of Charlie's New Chapter: A Story About Life After Retirement

Once upon a time, in a bustling town where everyone knew each other's names, there lived a man named Charlie.

For as long as anyone could remember, Charlie was the owner of a local hardware store, Charlie's Fix-It Shop . It wasn’t just any hardware store—it was the place everyone went when they needed something fixed, something built, or simply a friendly chat. For over forty years, Charlie greeted his customers with a smile, offered advice on all things tools and gadgets, and kept the town in tip-top shape.

But now, Charlie was getting older.

His back ached more than it used to, and he began to realize that his time running the shop might be coming to an end. It wasn’t that he didn’t love his work anymore—he did—but deep down, Charlie knew it was time for him to step aside and enjoy the quieter days ahead. There was just one problem: Charlie was scared.

"What's next?" he asked himself as he paced the aisles of his beloved shop one evening. "What will I do when I’m no longer 'Charlie, the hardware guy'? Who will I be?"

You see, Charlie didn’t just run a business—he was the business. For decades, people had relied on him, and his identity was wrapped up in fixing things for everyone else. Now, the idea of retirement felt like a door closing on everything he had ever known. Charlie feared he would feel lost without his daily routine, without his customers, and without his shop.

One day, his friend Margot, who ran a flower shop next door, noticed the worry on Charlie's face.

"Charlie," she said, "why don’t you make a plan for what comes next? You don’t have to walk away from the store without knowing what the future holds. Let’s sit down and figure it out."

So they did.

The next morning, Margot brought a pot of coffee to Charlie's shop, and the two friends sat down to talk about his future. Margot knew that for Charlie, the biggest concern wasn’t money—he had saved well enough for his retirement—but rather how he would fill his days and what he would do once the shop was no longer his responsibility.

"Let’s start by thinking about what you enjoy outside of the store," Margot suggested. "What makes you happy, Charlie? What do you want to do that you never had time for before?"

Charlie scratched his head and thought for a moment. "Well," he said slowly, "I’ve always wanted to spend more time out in nature. I love fishing, but I hardly ever get the chance. And I’ve been meaning to restore that old boat of mine—it’s been sitting in my garage for years."

Margot smiled. "That’s a great start. You could take your time fixing up the boat and maybe even go on a fishing trip once it’s ready."

Charlie’s face brightened a little at the thought. "You know, I always did dream of spending a whole day out on the lake, with nothing but the sound of the water and a fishing pole in hand," he said wistfully.

"And what about people?" Margot asked. "I know how much you love helping others. Maybe there's a way to still do that in retirement."

Charlie nodded. "I’ve been thinking about that too. I’d miss the folks who come into the shop. Maybe I could volunteer a few days a week. There's that new community center they built by the park. I could help them run maintenance or even teach young kids how to fix things."

Margot clapped her hands. "See? You’re already coming up with a plan. Your days will be full of things you enjoy, just in a different way. You won’t have to fix leaky faucets for customers anymore, but you can still fix things—and people will still appreciate your help."

The more they talked, the more ideas they came up with. Charlie could take woodworking classes—something he had always wanted to try but never had the time for. He could travel a little, visit places he hadn’t seen before. And, most importantly, he realized he could still be the same Charlie, just without the shop. His identity wasn’t going anywhere; it was just expanding.

As the days passed, Charlie began to feel less anxious about leaving the hardware store. He decided to train a young apprentice to take over the business, ensuring the shop would still be in good hands after he retired. This gave him peace of mind—he could step away knowing that Charlie's Fix-It Shop would continue to serve the town, even without him at the helm.

A few months later, the big day came. Charlie turned the keys over to his apprentice and waved goodbye to his beloved shop for the last time as its owner. But instead of just feeling sad, Charlie felt something unexpected— relief . He had a plan now, a clear vision of what his days would look like. He wasn’t walking into an uncertain future—he was walking into a future filled with fishing trips, woodworking, volunteer work, and a newfound sense of freedom.

As the sun set that evening, Charlie sat on the front porch of his home, sipping a cup of tea. He smiled to himself, knowing that his next chapter was just beginning. Retirement wasn’t an ending—it was simply a new adventure, and one he was ready to embrace.

And so, Charlie found peace in his transition, not because he was leaving behind his shop, but because he had found a way to carry forward the things that truly mattered to him—his love for fixing things, his connection to the community, and the joy of learning something new.

And in the end, that’s what made all the difference.

Three Key Takeaways for Advisors from Charlie's Story

Help Clients Envision Life After Retirement

Just like Charlie, many business owners struggle to imagine life beyond their work. As an advisor, it’s essential to guide clients in visualizing a fulfilling retirement. Encourage them to explore personal interests, hobbies, and new activities that give them purpose and joy in their post-business lives.

Emphasize Planning Beyond Finances

Financial security is important, but emotional fulfillment is key to a successful retirement. Help your clients create a comprehensive post-exit plan that focuses not just on their financial needs, but also on their personal goals, passions, and ways they can continue contributing to their community.

Encourage Gradual Transitions

Like Charlie training his apprentice, easing out of business ownership can help clients feel less anxious about the transition. Suggest ways they can gradually reduce their involvement in the business, allowing them to step into retirement with confidence while ensuring continuity and peace of mind.

How To Say "No" Without Offending Others

Wed, 27 Nov 2024 15:41:12 GMT

Saying “no” is an essential skill. Done well, it sets boundaries and maintains relationships.

Here are five ways to decline without creating conflict.

1. Be Direct, but Polite

“I appreciate you asking, but I can’t commit to that right now.”
This shows respect while standing your ground.

2. Offer an Alternative

“I’m not available for that, but have you tried [another option]?”
Redirecting helps without leaving them stranded.

3. Blame Your Priorities

“I have too much on my plate to do this justice.”
Most people understand busy schedules. It’s honest and clear.

4. Delay Your Response

“Let me check my schedule and get back to you.”
This gives you time to consider without a rushed decision.

5. Use Humor to Deflect

“I’d love to help, but cloning myself isn’t working out yet!”
A lighthearted reply softens the decline while making your limits clear.

Saying “no” doesn’t have to harm relationships. A mix of honesty, tact, and kindness keeps things smooth. Practice these approaches and see what works best for you.

25 Ways To Express Gratitude

Fri, 22 Nov 2024 20:11:19 GMT

The Strategic Power of Gratitude

Thanksgiving is a time to gather and give thanks. But it's also a time to reflect on how intentionally we’re living our lives. For those of us who aspire to live strategically—by design and not merely by default—gratitude is so much more than an ideal - it’s an essential cornerstone.

Gratitude sharpens your focus, anchors your decisions, and fuels your drive to create a life aligned with purpose and meaning.

Living by design requires you to be deliberate about where you place your energy and attention. Gratitude is the compass that helps you navigate this path. It reminds you of what matters most, shifts your perspective from scarcity to abundance, and builds resilience in the face of challenges.

A life rooted in gratitude allows you to approach each moment with intention, making you more adaptable, more fulfilled, and ultimately more in control of your journey.

Want some ideas to rethink the expression of gratitude? Here are 25 of them:

Practice Daily Reflection : Start or end each day by writing down three things you’re grateful for.
Celebrate Small Wins : Acknowledge and appreciate the small victories in your daily life.
Express Thanks to Others : Verbally thank people who contribute to your happiness or success.
Volunteer Your Time : Give back to your community to show appreciation for what you have.
Mindful Eating : Savor your meals and appreciate the effort and resources that brought them to your table.
Spend Time in Nature : Observe the beauty of the world around you and feel gratitude for its existence.
Write Gratitude Letters : Send handwritten notes to people who have positively impacted your life.
Meditate on Gratitude : Dedicate part of your meditation practice to focusing on what you're thankful for.
Keep a Gratitude Journal : Regularly write down moments of gratitude to reflect upon.
Pay It Forward : Perform random acts of kindness to spread gratitude and positivity.
Celebrate Relationships : Take time to nurture and appreciate the people who mean the most to you.
Live in the Present : Fully immerse yourself in the moment to appreciate it as it unfolds.
Be Grateful for Challenges : Recognize the growth and learning opportunities in difficult times.
Practice Minimalism : Simplify your life to appreciate the essentials more deeply.
Use Affirmations : Remind yourself daily of the blessings in your life with positive statements.
Smile Often : A simple smile can be an expression of gratitude for life.
Listen Actively : Show appreciation to others by being fully present when they speak.
Learn Continuously : Be grateful for the ability to grow through knowledge and experiences.
Celebrate Diversity : Appreciate the differences in people and cultures that enrich your life.
Create Art or Music : Use creative expression as a way to honor and channel your gratitude.
Give Meaningful Gifts : Offer thoughtful tokens of gratitude to those who inspire or support you.
Practice Patience : Be grateful for the process rather than rushing to the outcome.
Care for Your Body : Exercise, eat well, and rest as acts of gratitude for your physical health.
Cherish Memories : Look back on meaningful moments with gratitude for the joy they brought you.
Cultivate Forgiveness : Let go of grudges to appreciate the peace and freedom that forgiveness brings.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Fathers and Sons During Succession Planning

Wed, 20 Nov 2024 20:43:08 GMT

Father-Son Conflict in Succession Planning:

A Comprehensive Guide to Achieving Successful Outcomes

Succession planning in family businesses, particularly between fathers and sons, presents unique challenges. Balancing familial relationships with business interests requires careful navigation to ensure a smooth transition and maintain strong post-succession relationships. This guide outlines the common sources of conflict and provides a step-by-step approach to achieving a successful and harmonious succession.

Common Sources of Father-Son Conflict in Succession Planning

Differing Visions for the Business : Fathers may prefer traditional methods, while sons might advocate for innovation, leading to disagreements on the company's direction.
Control and Authority Issues : Fathers may struggle to relinquish control, causing sons to feel constrained and undervalued.
Communication Gaps : Lack of open and honest communication can result in misunderstandings and unresolved tensions.
Role Ambiguity : Unclear definitions of roles and responsibilities can lead to power struggles and confusion.
Emotional Entanglement : Personal relationships can complicate professional interactions, making objective decision-making challenging.

Step-by-Step Guide to Achieving a Successful Succession

Initiate Early and Open Communication

Discuss Expectations : Fathers and sons should openly discuss their expectations, aspirations, and concerns regarding the business's future.
Establish Regular Meetings : Schedule consistent meetings to address ongoing issues and adjust plans as needed.

Develop a Clear Succession Plan

Define Roles and Responsibilities : Clearly outline the roles each party will assume during and after the transition.
Set a Timeline : Establish a realistic timeline for the succession process, allowing adequate time for preparation and adjustment.
Document the Plan : Create a formal, written succession plan to serve as a reference and guide.

Seek External Guidance

Engage Professional Advisors : Consultants specializing in family business succession can provide objective insights and facilitate difficult conversations.
Consider Mentorship Programs : Implement structured mentorship to guide the successor through the transition.

Implement Leadership Development

Provide Training Opportunities : Offer education and training to equip the successor with necessary skills and knowledge.
Encourage External Experience : Exposure to external business environments can broaden perspectives and enhance leadership capabilities.

Establish Governance Structures

Create Advisory Boards : Form boards comprising family and non-family members to provide balanced oversight and advice.
Develop Family Constitutions : Draft documents outlining the family's values, vision, and protocols for decision-making and conflict resolution.

Address Emotional and Psychological Factors

Acknowledge Emotional Dynamics : Recognize and address the emotional aspects of succession, including fears, anxieties, and identity issues.
Facilitate Counseling if Needed : Professional counseling can help navigate complex emotional landscapes and improve relationships.

Plan for the Retiring Leader's Future

Define Post-Retirement Roles : Clearly outline any ongoing roles or advisory positions for the retiring father to prevent overlap and confusion.
Encourage Personal Pursuits : Support the retiring leader in finding new interests or projects to ease the transition.

Navigating father-son conflicts during succession planning requires a structured approach that balances business needs with familial relationships. By initiating open communication, developing clear plans, seeking external guidance, and addressing emotional factors, families can achieve a successful transition that preserves both the business's integrity and family harmony.

References

"Family Business Succession Planning: 10 Golden Rules." Family Business Institute. Family Business Alliance
"Family Business Succession Planning: The Definitive Guide & FAQs." Transmission Private. Transmission Private
"Father/Son Conflict—An Obstacle To Change In Family Business." The Family Business Leader. The Family Business Leader
"Succession Planning for Family Businesses." Family Business Consulting Group. Family Business Alliance
"Resolving the Father-Son Conflict in a Family Business: A Path to Harmony and Success." WB Advisory Asia. WB Advisory Asia

Understanding the Emotion of Conflict During Exit Planning for Business Owners

Wed, 20 Nov 2024 12:05:50 GMT

CONFLICT

 Understanding the Emotion of Conflict During Exit Planning for Business Owners

Exiting a business often stirs up intense emotions for owners, and one of the strongest is conflict. It’s not just external conflicts with stakeholders, family members, or potential buyers, but an internal battle within the owner. This inner conflict can stem from opposing desires—wanting to move on yet feeling deeply attached to the business, or seeking financial gain while preserving a meaningful legacy.

Recognizing and addressing this conflict early in the exit process is essential. If you ignore it, unresolved feelings can cloud decision-making and lead to unnecessary tension. The first step is to identify what’s driving this conflict. For many, it’s the clash between personal identity and business identity. Owners often intertwine their self-worth and identity with their business. They’ve poured years—sometimes decades—into building something substantial, and the thought of stepping away can feel like a loss of self. Recognizing that your role as an owner is separate from your identity is a vital realization. This separation enables clearer, more objective decisions without the emotional weight of identity attachment.

Family dynamics can intensify these feelings. Suppose family members work within the business or anticipate inheritance roles. In that case, owners may struggle with pleasing family expectations versus what’s best for the business. Similarly, advisors and potential buyers may have their own ideas, which can clash with the owner’s vision, leaving them feeling torn between competing viewpoints. In these scenarios, you must communicate openly and transparently, outlining your goals and values so stakeholders understand your priorities. This transparency builds trust and can prevent larger disputes from arising.

One of the most effective ways to manage conflict is to establish guiding principles early on. Define the most important aspects of your legacy, financial security, and family expectations. This framework helps clarify priorities, giving you a solid reference point for each decision you face. Consider seeking an objective advisor or coach to help you assess your motives and provide a balanced perspective during challenging moments.

Ultimately, the goal is not to eliminate conflict—it’s to manage it constructively. By addressing the emotional roots of your inner struggles and communicating transparently with those affected, you’ll navigate the exit process with greater clarity and confidence, setting the stage for a successful transition and the peace of mind that comes with it.

This document is part of a curated library of strategic insights by Serving Strong Enterprises. It combines AI-assisted research with expert refinement to ensure relevance and depth. Each piece addresses key aspects of exit planning with a nuanced understanding of the challenges business owners and advisors face.

How to Help Clients Overcome the Fear of Making the Wrong Exit Decision

Fri, 15 Nov 2024 13:51:58 GMT

How to Help Clients Overcome the Fear of Making the Wrong Exit Decision

Some owners will wrestle with the fear of making the wrong exit decision and it can be paralyzing. As their advisor, you are uniquely positioned to help them work through this fear. By guiding clients in clarifying their values, defining clear objectives, and using structured decision-making, you can empower them to make confident, informed choices.

Here’s how to help clients navigate this fear and move toward a secure and purposeful exit.

1. Help Clients Clarify Their Values

Many owners hesitate because they worry about whether their exit decision will truly align with their life goals. They might fear sacrificing their legacy, losing identity, or missing out on future opportunities. Help them confront these fears by clarifying their core values.

Start by exploring what matters most to them. Is it family, financial security, or continued influence in their industry? By identifying these values, clients can better assess potential exit strategies. When decisions are rooted in their core beliefs, they gain clarity and confidence. This foundation allows them to approach the exit process with a clear sense of purpose.

2. Define Specific Exit Goals

Unclear goals often feed the fear of making the wrong choice. Assist clients in defining specific, measurable goals for their exit. These may include financial targets, desired roles post-exit, or timelines for stepping away.

Having defined goals gives clients concrete benchmarks to measure decisions against. For example, if their goal is to ensure financial security, evaluate each exit option’s financial implications. If legacy is a priority, explore succession plans that maintain their influence in the business. Clear goals transform vague fears into focused questions, making decisions more straightforward.

3. Provide Scenario Planning and Projections

One of the most effective ways to ease fear of regret is by showing clients a range of potential outcomes. Use scenario planning to present best-case, worst-case, and moderate scenarios for each exit option. This helps clients visualize the impact of each decision and prepares them for a range of possibilities.

Financial projections, succession impact assessments, and lifestyle analyses can all be part of this process. By seeing the numbers and understanding likely scenarios, clients gain reassurance that they are making informed choices. Scenario planning makes the future feel more tangible and reduces the fear of the unknown.

4. Encourage a Phased or Gradual Exit

A sudden exit can increase the fear of making the wrong decision. If possible, suggest a phased or gradual exit to ease clients into the transition. This might involve reducing their workload over time, taking on an advisory role, or retaining partial ownership.

A phased approach allows clients to stay connected to their business while gradually adjusting to life beyond ownership. It also allows for course correction if any issues arise, reducing the pressure to “get it right” all at once.

5. Reinforce Decision-Making as an Ongoing Process

Remind clients that their exit is not a one-time decision, but a process that can evolve. Many decisions can be adjusted or refined as they go, especially if they start early. Let them know that thoughtful, ongoing planning reduces the need for perfection. It also encourages them to view their exit as adaptable, which can reduce fear of finality.

Regular check-ins and reviews help clients feel confident that they’re making progress toward their goals. By addressing concerns as they arise, you can offer guidance that keeps them aligned with their values and objectives.

6. Highlight Their Past Success in Decision-Making

Clients often overlook the skills that made them successful in business when it comes to exiting. Remind them of the decisions they’ve made throughout their career that led to success. By recognizing their past achievements, they can approach their exit with confidence in their ability to make sound choices.

Building trust in their own decision-making skills reassures clients that they can handle this transition effectively. It shows them that, while the exit decision may feel different, their skills are still reliable.

7. Normalize the Fear and Build Support

Let clients know that feeling uncertain is common. Normalize the fear of making the wrong decision by explaining that many business owners face it. Encourage them to speak openly about their concerns and to rely on a support network—whether that’s family, colleagues, or a trusted mentor.

Building a support network provides clients with additional perspectives and reassurance, easing the burden of going through the process alone. Letting them know their feelings are valid reduces pressure and reinforces that they are supported.

Conclusion

Helping clients overcome the fear of making the wrong exit decision requires a structured, values-based approach. By clarifying their priorities, defining specific goals, offering scenario planning, and supporting a phased transition, you can guide clients toward a confident and informed decision. Your role as an advisor is to provide stability, reassurance, and clarity, making the exit process feel achievable and aligned with their long-term vision.

Regrets Of The Famous

Thu, 03 Oct 2024 14:11:41 GMT

Throughout history, countless individuals have experienced regret and used it as a catalyst for personal growth and transformation. In this post, we will explore several examples of famous people who have turned their regrets into opportunities for growth, demonstrating the potential for resilience and self-improvement in the face of adversity.

Oprah Winfrey

Oprah Winfrey, one of the most influential media personalities in the world, has faced her share of regrets throughout her life and career. One notable example is her decision to launch the Oprah Winfrey Network (OWN) in 2011, which initially struggled with low ratings and financial challenges. Reflecting on this experience, Oprah acknowledged her regret, stating that she would have done things differently if she had the chance. However, instead of dwelling on her regrets, Oprah used the experience as a catalyst for growth, learning valuable lessons about leadership and business, and eventually turning OWN into a successful network.

Michael Jordan

Considered one of the greatest basketball players of all time, Michael Jordan has also experienced regret in his life. After retiring from basketball in 1993, Jordan pursued a career in baseball, which many saw as a failure. Jordan later returned to basketball in 1995, and in an interview with ESPN, he expressed regret over his decision to leave basketball in the first place. However, this regret fueled his desire to prove himself once again, ultimately leading him to win three more NBA championships with the Chicago Bulls and solidifying his legacy as a legendary athlete.

J.K. Rowling

J.K. Rowling, the author of the beloved Harry Potter series, has openly shared her regrets and struggles, including her experience with depression and her difficult first marriage. In her now-famous 2008 Harvard commencement speech, Rowling spoke about the importance of embracing failure and using it as an opportunity for growth . She explained that her regrets and setbacks ultimately led her to focus on her true passion—writing—and gave her the determination and resilience to create one of the most successful literary franchises in history.

Steve Jobs

The late Apple co-founder Steve Jobs experienced a significant regret in 1985 when he was ousted from the company he had built. In a 2005 Stanford commencement speech, Jobs spoke about the pain of being fired from Apple and how it led him to question his abilities and direction in life. However, this regretful experience proved to be a catalyst for growt h, as Jobs went on to found NeXT and Pixar, and eventually returned to Apple, where he revolutionized the technology industry with products like the iPhone and iPad.

Robert Downey Jr.

Actor Robert Downey Jr.'s career was once marred by substance abuse, arrests, and stints in rehab, leading to a significant downturn in his professional life. In a 2008 interview with Oprah Winfrey, Downey spoke candidly about his regrets, admitting that he had wasted years of his life on addiction. However, instead of allowing his regrets to define him, Downey transformed his life , becoming sober and rebuilding his career to become one of the highest-grossing actors in Hollywood, known for his iconic role as Iron Man in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

These examples demonstrate that even the most successful and influential individuals experience regret, and that with resilience, determination, and a willingness to learn from our mistakes, we can turn our regrets into opportunities for personal growth and transformation .

Finding Purpose Beyond Profit

Fri, 02 Aug 2024 12:52:30 GMT

Hallmark: Spiritually Anchored

In the hustle and bustle of running a business, it’s easy to lose sight of what truly matters. As a business owner, especially one approaching the twilight of your career, it’s crucial to find a deeper purpose that transcends the daily grind. Being spiritually anchored means having a strong sense of purpose and values that guide your decisions and actions.

Why It Matters: A spiritually anchored life provides a strong foundation in times of crisis and change. It helps you stay grounded and focused on what truly matters, ensuring that your business decisions align with your core values.

How to Cultivate It:

Reflect on Your Core Values: Take time to identify what truly matters to you. What principles do you want to stand by, regardless of business pressures?
Incorporate Values into Business: Ensure your business practices reflect your personal values. This can involve ethical practices, community involvement, or focusing on sustainable business models.
Mindfulness and Meditation: Regular mindfulness or meditation practices can help you stay connected to your spiritual beliefs and values.

Conclusion: Being spiritually anchored is about more than just profit; it’s about creating a legacy that aligns with your deepest values. This alignment not only enhances personal fulfillment but also positively impacts your business culture and reputation.

This one action will help you in many ways

Tue, 30 Jul 2024 20:38:08 GMT

This one action will create a huge return.

Why Does Serving Strong Exist?

Tue, 30 Jul 2024 12:43:33 GMT

The Why, How, and What

One of the best ways to describe Serving Strong is using Simon Sinek's now famous "golden circles".

WHY

In June 2015, my life was irrevocably changed. I experienced a profound loss that stripped away not only my career but also my very identity. The fallout from this event was devastating, leading me to a dark place that took a considerable amount of time and effort to recover from. Looking back on that tumultuous period, I would have benefited greatly from having a partner who could have guided me through the chaos, someone who had walked this path before and could help me navigate my way out. Today, I have become that partner for others. I am driven by the conviction that if I had the support I needed back then, I would not have sunk as low nor taken as long to rebuild my life. This personal journey has become the foundation of my "why" – the deep-rooted purpose behind what I do.

I work with business owners who are planning their exit, applying the same principles of strategic planning and execution that are prevalent in the business world to their personal lives. The process of crafting a personal strategic plan is not unlike creating a business strategy. It involves setting clear goals, defining actionable steps, and continually assessing and adjusting the plan to ensure success. My framework is built around six hallmarks or pillars that encompass all aspects of a fantastic life: spiritual, physical, relational, emotional, vocational, and financial. These pillars form the bedrock of a strategic plan designed to help individuals navigate the complexities of life transitions.

HOW

The "how" of my approach is rooted in the meticulous application of strategic initiatives to personal development. By systematically addressing each of the six hallmarks, I guide my clients through a comprehensive process of self-discovery, goal setting, and execution. This process ensures that every aspect of their lives is aligned with their core values and long-term vision. It is a holistic approach that goes beyond surface-level changes, digging into the fundamental aspects of what it means to live a fulfilling and balanced life.

WHAT

Ultimately, the outcome of my work is the transformation that occurs when individuals choose to live life by design rather than by default. This intentional approach to living leads to a more fulfilling present and significantly reduces the number of regrets in the future. My clients find themselves not only better prepared for the challenges that come with major life transitions but also more at peace with their decisions and more confident in their ability to achieve their personal and professional goals. By helping business owners create and execute their personal strategic plans, I empower them to take control of their lives and build a legacy they can be proud of. Working together, we craft a scenario where owners have something to run to as they are exiting their business.

The Rudder

Tue, 22 Feb 2022 16:26:12 GMT

In the lake called life, it's the rudder that matters.

The rudder is small, but it steers the entire ship.

To get to a desired spot across the lake, one must set a course and then follow it up with a multitude of adjustments along the way, given the unknown variables that inevitably seek to push one off course.

These adjustments with the rudder take into account the end result. Every experience is a learning opportunity to leverage for the next step. That is the rudder.

By the way, these are not adjustments like the undisciplined one who has no end goal in mind but would rather simply live and react to whatever comes his way. That method may seem like freedom. But it will only lead to regret. And even though it seems like freedom at the time, it is not.

You are navigating the lake called life. In it are a number of variables that seek to keep you off course to your destination.

What is your destination? It's the type of person you wish to be.

What is your method? The adjustments with the rudder.

So, decide the type of person you wish to be, and then prove it to yourself by your behaviors . ( read more about this in James Clear's book, Atomic Habits ).

The true course for fulfillment and a reduction in regrets is to be about the business of becoming the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design.

Full Expression

Sun, 06 Feb 2022 22:00:03 GMT

This is a subtitle for your new post

You're completely and utterly immersed in a task.
You're oblivious to the outside world.
You're focused only on your own progress and what’s going on right here and now.
You're doing something you love.
You realize time has totally passed you by.

If these have ever described you at some point in your life, it's likely you have been in a state of Flow .

Flow is when you are wrapped completely in the present where your creativity, productivity, and happiness collide to create a heightened state of incredible happiness.

In the realm of Excellence, it is known as being the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design .

So how do we get to this state?

Here are a few ideas for your consideration:

Arrive at a clear understanding of your identity
Have clear and distinct goals that flow out of that identity
Develop clear action steps necessary to reach the goal
Remove all distractions
It also helps that the goal you are achieving is both challenging and enjoyable

The Art of Excellence

coach@servingstrong.com (Scott Couchenour) — Sun, 30 Jan 2022 20:00:13 GMT

Excellence is not a goal to be achieved, but a life to be lived.

Beginning with this post, the content you will see coming out of this blog will be rooted in an outline of a body of knowledge. That body of knowledge is called THE ART OF EXCELLENCE.

This Art of Excellence is broken into 5 sections:

01.000 The Definition of Excellence
02.000 The Journey of Excellence
03.000 The Person of Excellence
04.000 The Business of Excellence
05.000 The Process of Excellence

We will travel through these 5 sections and there will be subsections under each one.

To give you a better understanding at the outset of this content strategy, here is the essence of each section:

The Definition of Excellence* - I will explain what I mean by excellence, since it can easily be misunderstood.
The Journey of Excellence - I will share from experience how the journey to becoming excellent is a narrow and difficult path with highs and lows.
The Person of Excellence - I will unpack how we are knitted together with 6 separate systems that work in harmony with one another.
The Business of Excellence - Just like the Person of Excellence, I will unpack how an excellent business is organized and structured.
The Process of Excellence - I will share the 5-step iterative cycle that is required to become a person, or business, of excellence.

It is my hope that as I delve into the various topics and ideas, you will be able to easily navigate the 5 sections as I tag each post with the appropriate number for the section they address.

Here is a post I shared on LinkedIn

Here is a link to the working outline in Workflowy

Thanks, in advance, for joining me in this journey called, The Art of Excellence.

* Spoiler Alert: The definition of Excellence is this -

The act of becoming the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design.

The Ups and Downs of Excellence

Sat, 22 Jan 2022 11:00:04 GMT

This journey is not for the faint of heart.

The journey of excellence is a thrilling experience.

I know because I'm on that very journey right now in my life.

But don't be fooled. It's not an easy journey.

Excellence takes real hard work.

There will be ups and downs and some of those downs will be way down.

Here are two aspects about the journey I'd like to address in this particular post.

I think you will need to know if you want to take the journey for yourself:

It starts with clarity.

Alice in Wonderland asked the Cheshire Cat,

"Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?"

"That depends a good deal on where you want to get to," said the Cat.

"I don't much care where-" said Alice.

"Then it doesn't matter which way you go," said the Cat.

"-so long as I get SOMEWHERE," Alice added as an explanation.

"Oh, you're sure to do that," said the Cat, "if you only walk long enough."

So how clear are you about who you are? What's your identity?

Let me give you a clue: It's not your goals.

Goals are only an expression of who you are.

Get clarity on who you are first. The process and the outcomes will become much clearer as a result.

It's about iteration

You can have 10 years of experience, or you can have 1 year of experience 10 times.

Which would you rather have?

I'll take the 10 years of accumulated experience.

This means you will need to iterate.

Iteration means taking what you learn (from both success and/or failure) and leveraging it for the next cycle. Iteration means building upon itself.

A movie series that builds on itself (like Hell on Wheels) requires that you start from the beginning.

That's because it tells a story. You need the context to know what happens later on.

But a series that doesn't build on itself (like Seinfeld) means you can jump in at any point.

The journey of excellence is one that builds on itself.

It's extremely rewarding to look back and see how far you've come, isn't it?

I'd rather have ups and downs with a trend upward instead of an endless cycle of ups and downs with nothing to show for it over time.

Wouldn't you?

3 Signs Of Personal Excellence

Sun, 16 Jan 2022 20:00:02 GMT

Live more today. Regret less tomorrow.

Let's begin with the definition of Excellence . That way, we'll be on the same page when it comes to understanding what it means to be a Person of Excellence.

Here's the definition :

"Excellence is the act of becoming the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design."

Let's parse that:

"...the act of becoming..." - this means that we will never know what it means to be fully expressing our unique design in this life. Excellence then is an action. It's the becoming, always working forward.

"...the fullest expression..." - this is the manifestation of who you are. It's the tangible, observable set of behaviors that emerge from who you are.

"...of your unique, God-given design." - you were created. Any creation is a reflection of the greater creator. You may not believe as I do, but I want you to consider the idea that, given the complexity and yet simplicity of our bodies, we were not a random accident.

Okay, with the definition, let's proceed...

Observe a Person of Excellence and you will see a general consistency where 2 dynamics are taking place:

First - they are increasingly fulfilled in today. They recognize, and revel in, the fact that the present is a present.
Second - they are investing in lesser regrets in the future.

Fulfillment today goes up.

Regret tomorrow goes down.

Sounds like a cool way to live, no?

Here are 3 signs of personal excellence. See if they match what you are doing in your life:

ONE: A person of excellence knows who they are.

Research has determined that the chances of you being born are 1 in 400,000,000,000. If you are reading this blog post, chances are, you won the lottery!! A Person of Excellence understands these odds and embraces the uniqueness.

A Person of Excellence understands where they generally fall on 2 spectrums: Pace and Orientation.

PACE : There is a continuum of pace. On the extreme left is slow and methodical. On the the extreme right is fast and impulsive. Both are equally harmful if taken to the extremes. But we all fall somewhere on that continuum. It is the Person with Excellence who knows where that position is.

ORIENTATION : As with pave, there is also a continuum of orientation. On the extreme left is task orientation. On the extreme right is people orientation. Both are equally harmful if taken to the extremes. But we all fall somewhere on that continuum as well.

That leads to 4 possible areas:

Fast-Paced, Task Orientation (entrepreneurs)
Slow-Paced, Task Orientation (accountants)
Fast-Paced, People Orientation (some salespeople)
Slow-Paced, People Orientation (counselors)

A Person of Excellence is always reviewing their personal aspirations. Yes, they have goals. Yes they have some planning and preparing in their life. But they are regularly going deep inside to remind themselves of why they are on the earth. Aspirations comes from the old French term relating to breath. Since breath is something we take with us everywhere we go, aspirations transcend goals and plans. They are a description of who we bring to every goal and every plan.

TWO: A person of excellence is actively expressing their design.

At our church, the tech team will utilize two elements as part of worship. Light beams and smoke. Stage lights are generally seen for what they are. However, they also are designed to give off a light beam. The beams are not always evident unless you have the other element, smoke. It is the smoke that reveals the light beam, adding a richer experience in worship.

The same is true for the Person of Excellence. They are not only content with their unique design. They are actively engaged in the expression of that design. They don't just have the light beams. But they are creating the smoke that brings out those light beams.

THREE: A person of excellence is fallible.

Seems strange at first to combine the idea of excellence with failure. But I would like to make the case that it is the essence of fallibility that is central to a life of excellence. Look at the merits of failure:

Failure reveals a better path.

Failure leads to humility (which leads to knowledge).

Failure protects from ego-centric fatality.

The Person of Excellence uses their own fallible nature to work for them. They leverage it to create a life of humble iteration. Without humble iteration, it is impossible to become the fullest expression.

Are you a Person of Excellence?

What traits have I missed?

The 3P Method

Mon, 10 Jan 2022 13:59:52 GMT

Getting it all out of your mind and on paper is only the beginning.

Let's assume you've taken some time to get everything out of your head and written it down on paper. It feels good to get it all out of your head, doesn't it? But once the therapeutic effect wears off, you're left with a piece of paper with all your thoughts randomly listed. Now it's time to do a little discerning.

Michael Bungay in his book, The Coaching Habit, introduces the idea of the 3P Model.

The 3P model is a framework for choosing what to focus on in a coaching conversation—for deciding which aspect of a challenge might be at the heart of a difficulty that the person is working through. A challenge might typically be centered on a project, a person or a pattern of behavior.

While Bungay is talking about coaching people you lead, it is also a good method for assessing the problem you're dealing with at any one time. Let's look at the 3P's.

PROJECTS

A project is the content of the situation, the stuff that’s being worked on. It’s the easiest place to go to and it will be the most familiar to most of us. We spend our days finding solutions to challenges, and our eyes are almost always on the situation at hand.

Is the problem you're wrestling with coming from the work you're doing?

PEOPLE

Have you ever thought, " Work would be easy if it weren’t for all these annoying people? Surely, it’s not just me ." Certainly, situations are always made more complex when you—in all your imperfect, not-always-rational, messy, biased, hasn’t-fully-obtained-enlightenment glory—have to work with others who, surprisingly, are also imperfect, not always rational, messy, biased, and a few steps short of full wisdom and compassion.

Is the problem you're wrestling with coming from a connection with someone else?

PATTERNS

Here you’re looking at patterns of behavior and ways of working that you’d like to change. They are personal and challenging, and they provide a place where your self-knowledge and potential can grow and flourish. These conversations are not nearly common enough in organizations.

Is the problem you're wrestling with coming from a pattern of behavior?

A point to remember is once you've downloaded everything that's in your mind, you now have information to sift through. Rather than just sift aimlessly, use the 3P Model to begin discerning what you're looking at.

Source:

Stanier, Michael Bungay. The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever. Box of Crayons Press. Kindle Edition.

Take Stock

coach@servingstrong.com (Scott Couchenour) — Fri, 31 Dec 2021 12:00:47 GMT

"Filter your pain through the brevity of this life and the unending beauty of the next." Max Lucado

He stepped out into the dark alley and into the cold, damp air of the night.

The metal door gave out a loud clang as it shut behind him.

His face felt the cold breeze of the winds from the north.

He contemplated the recent events.

How could it be?

Why did it happen now?

It wasn't supposed to be this way.

It was too soon.

"It's always too soon," he supposed to himself,

Cancer.

It showed up in her body long before anyone noticed.

It grew among the healthy cells until it started squeezing out the frontal lobe.

She started forgetting where she was.

The cat scan indicated a Glioblastoma Multiforme - the most aggressive type of cancer that begins within the brain. It caused her headaches, followed by personality change, nausea.

She was a brilliant person.

She made him laugh.

She astonished him with her courage in the face of significant, life-altering situations.

Her father had died unexpectedly.

She was furloughed and eventually let go from her job mid-way through the pandemic in 2020.

She had a miscarriage.

And yet through all that, she remained authentic, genuine, and a pillar of hope.

Now gone. Forever.

As the wind picked up, it brought to his attention the tears that had been flowing without him even noticing.

He folded his arms in an attempt to bring himself warmth.

The back door to the funeral home opened, jolting him out of his silent revelry.

"They would like to have you come back in," said his son.

"I'll be right there," he replied.

Strange how the loss of someone so close to us can make us take stock of our lives.

We are reminded of the brevity of life and it confuses our mind.

Protagoras once said, "Many things prevent knowledge, including the obscurity of the subject and the brevity of human life."

In moments such as these, we find ourselves at a crossroads.

We either take it as it comes to us and let it eventually define who we are by default.

Or we take it and leverage it by design for who we can become - the fullest expression of our unique, God-given design.

As I write this, the last couple days are relinquishing their grip on 2021 to make way for 2022.

Even though it's just another overnight segment of time from the 31st to the 1st, it's a significant time to take stock of your life.

This time of year (and any time of year, for that matter) you are at a crossroads.

You can either take it as it comes to you and let it eventually define who you are by default.

Or you can take it and leverage it by design for who you have yet to become - the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design.

Grab a piece of graph paper and imagine that every box represents a week in the life of a 90-year-old.

Now color in the boxes that represent the weeks you have already lived.

Notice how many boxes are left.

I did this and discovered that, if I live to age 90, I have already filled in over 62% of the 4,680 boxes.

More boxes behind me than lay before me.

That realization puts me at a crossroads.

I can either take life as it comes and let it define who I am by default.

Or I can leverage my current position by design for who I have yet to become - the fullest expression of my unique, God-given design.

How about you?

Will you join me in this new year as I take leave of my colored-in boxes and embrace the empty boxes to make something great?

Will you dare to be courageous enough to become the fullest expression of your unique design?

I hope so.

Speaking of hope, this is where hope resides.

Now, let's go join our friend back in the funeral home.

I hear the potato salad is really tasty.

4 Keys of Transformation

Fri, 24 Dec 2021 12:00:06 GMT

What got you here won't get you there.

You want to learn and grow and become better in the new year, right?

Well, if you're serious about it, let me share 4 questions and their respective keys that you'll need to incorporate as part of your transformation. Let me first set the stage.

ACTIONS

Every morning, you wake up. You get out of bed and do your morning routine. You do the things you do in the morning and that bleeds into the afternoon. You do the evening things. You get ready for bed and you go back to sleep. A typical day.

A typical day is made of a string of actions . You have them. I have them. Every person alive on the planet has them. When you think of it, our existence is simply a pile of actions.

To learn, grow, and become better you will have to go to the level of actions. Your personal growth won't happen on its own. It will require your active participation. Here are the 4 questions and keys that come into play:

WHAT DO I NEED TO STOP DOING?

Your learning and growth will mean you will need to stop some actions. The harmful ones are obvious. But it's the actions that have worked for you in the past that are the hardest to stop . The old saying is, "What got you where you are today will not be where you want to go tomorrow."

THE KEY is to make them hard to do. Self impose barriers and constraints so you don't slip into old habits.

WHAT DO I NEED TO START DOING?

Your learning and growth will mean that you have to start doing some actions you're not used to taking. You may be uncomfortable doing them. They may seem awkward, putting you at risk of failure or ridicule.

THE KEY is to make these new actions easy to do. Set up whatever tricks you need to make the new habits a part of your life.

WHAT DO I NEED TO KEEP DOING?

Your learning and growth won't impact everything you do. Some actions will remain the same . For example, you'll still need a morning routine. You'll still need sleep.

THE KEY is to separate these from the other three groups of actions so you preserve their continued healthy contribution to your growth.

WHAT DO I NEED TO CHANGE ?

Your learning and growth will mean that some actions will need to continue but take on a different form. For example, if you read a couple pages a day and your transformation requires more reading, you'll need to step up your game.

THE KEY is to carve out the time for your mental, physical, and emotional energy to do things a little differently.

Here's the deal. Only the courageous commit to change and follow through . I believe you are courageous. How can I say that? I believe everyone is designed to be courageous. Some people just choose to live a default life and not invest in changing and growing. You can tell if someone is like that when they say things like, "It is what it is" in a defeated tone.

AN INVITATION TO YOU

James Clear, author or Atomic Habits, has laid out a brilliant way for us to start good habits and stop bad habits.

It will be the first book we cover in the Serving Strong Book Club on January 7 at 12:00 pm EST. Because we are just starting the Club, we'll continue our study of Atomic Habits in February as well.

If you're interested in joining in the 45-minute conversation,

CLICK HERE TO REGISTER

It's free.

Clarity

Thu, 16 Dec 2021 17:12:46 GMT

Every situation has context.

I believe it was Charlie Kaufman, the American screenwriter, who said something like,

"When I'm writing, I'm trying to immerse myself in the chaos of an emotional experience, rather than separate myself from it, so I can ultimately look back at it from a distance with clarity and tell it as a story. Because that's how life is lived, you know?"

What's your story?

I bet it includes moments of exhilaration, moments of exasperation, and moments of extreme chaos. Mine does too.

I can still recall watching as the doors at the back of the sanctuary opened to reveal the most beautiful woman dressed in a white, flowing gown as she walked hand in hand with her father toward me to consent to build a life with me.

I can recall the first birthday of each of my kids as they entered the world wrinkled and complaining loudly at their unfamiliar surroundings.

I'll never forget sitting down beside my wife and explaining how we would have to close down the 44-year family business and face bankruptcy.

Easy, enjoyable situations. Tough, excruciating situations. String them together and what do you have? LIFE.

Every situation has a context.

Life is lived in the moment of the situation. There seem to be two distinct phases to facing situations well.

First, feel the emotion of the experience; name it; acknowledge it.
Second, step back and look at it in the context of the bigger picture.

That's clarity.

I've not always gotten clarity right away. There have been times when I have neglected the first phase and denied how I was feeling and jumped straight to phase two in order to rush the learning. To my dismay, it has only delayed clarity.

At first, clarity seems not so clear. When you are squirming and skirmishing with the emotions of the situation, it can seem like the emotions are getting the better of you. But do the squirming and skirmishing. It's part of the process of clarity. Until then, you won't be able to step back and look at it in context. Only then will it begin to make sense and you can tell your story to others. They, in turn, are empowered to learn from their own situations using the light from your story.

In the weeds

I bet you've heard these words before. You may have uttered them yourself. You say them when you're overwhelmed by the details of the situation you're facing. The reason you're overwhelmed is that, in the weeds, the locus of control resides outside of you. As a result, you feel as though you're being controlled by the situation rather than feeling a sense of control over it. The best thing to do is to get above the weeds.

When I work with my clients, one of the first things we do is what I call a "Download". It's step 1 of a 5-step cycle. Sensing the freedom of a non-judgmental, totally confidential space, they wrestle with the situation and pour out their thoughts one at a time. Each thought is like a step up the staircase to the balcony. When they can't think of another thing to say, they invariably utter a sigh of relief.

They are now in a position to see the situation from a more comprehensive perspective. This empowers them. The locus of control is back within them and they are in a much better position to take strategic measures.

That's clarity.

Clarity is freeing.

It's a wide-open space.

It's settling.

It leads to deeper assurance.

It soothes the soul.

Got clarity?

How about you? As you read this week's issue of GenX Weekly, do you feel as though you have clarity?

We GenXers are the "middle child" between the Baby Boomers and the Millennials. Often times that results in a lack of clarity.

I hope you'll join me as I seek to acknowledge my emotions before stepping back to gain context. I want to be a GenX leader with clarity.

Don't you?

Every Square A Week

coach@servingstrong.com (Scott Couchenour) — Tue, 14 Dec 2021 16:51:47 GMT

How will you navigate your last quarter of life?

Grab an 8.5 x 11 piece of grid paper and look at the squares.
Imagine each one is a week in your lifespan.
Now…

Fill in all the weeks you’ve lived so far.
What percent of the sheet is filled in?

Here are my numbers:
62.2% of a 90-year life lived (37.8% remaining).
71.7% of a 78-year life lived (28.3% remaining).

The remaining squares are your best weeks ever.
Why do I say that?
Because they’re all you have to work with.

Remember, today is the first day of the rest of your legacy.

#genxcoach #businessownership #legacy #leadership #exitstrategy #successionplanning

The 90 Day Sprint

Tue, 12 Jan 2021 17:12:16 GMT

The tallest of skyscrapers and your simple goal have one thing in common: they both require step-by-step execution.

There is no such thing as a strategy.

There can't be a strategy unless there is also execution. Otherwise, a strategy is just an idea. Worse, it's a waste of time. I bet you'd be surprised y the number of strategic plans lay dormant in a drawer of a CEO's desk or on the shelf buried inside a thick 3-ring binder.

Execution is the key. Look around you at everything in the place where you're reading this. Notice anything? What does everything you can see have in common? They are each a product of execution. The ideas that were never executed are wafting in the wind like a vapor totally unnoticed. Talk really is cheap.

So when I say execution, you might be wondering what I mean. Primarily, I mean 90-day sprints.

WHAT IS A 90-DAY SPRINT?

A 90-day sprint is made of 13 weeks. Twelve of those weeks are spent executing on atomic actions that guide you most, if all, of the way toward your desired outcome. The final week is reserved for a review. The review is where you look back on the 12 weeks of action and dig for what you can learn about yourself, your goal, and your overall life plan.

WHAT MAKES A SUCCESSFUL 90-DAY SPRINT?

One key to a successful sprint is in the low number of tasks you commit to your ownership partner (I dislike the word accountability because it seems so parent-child, so I use the word ownership. Your ownership partner holds you responsible for what you own in your agenda. That seems more like treating you like the adult that you are.)

No more than 2-3 actions in any one sprint. It may seem counter-intuitive, but trust me I know. Having 10 actions in 12 weeks will leave you disillusioned and discouraged. Why? Because you have a whirlwind - the daily stuff of life - to attend to as it happens. The whirlwind is unpredictable and can be almost devastating. So, in the midst of the whirlwind, you're performing daily actions. The best way to ensure success is to keep the number of actions to 2-3.

The second key to a 90-day sprint is to have that ownership partner and a recurring check-in appointment on your progress. This increases the probability of reaching your goal by 95% (based on research by the American Society of Training and Development (ASTD))

ACTION STEP

Select a desired outcome that you can see yourself accomplishing in 12 weeks
Identify all the actions that you could take to achieve the outcome
Select the top 20% of all actions that will likely generate 80% of the success and commit to 2 or 3 of them, maximum
Determine who your ownership partner will be and obtain agreement on a weekly check-in with them (you can do this in our group, The 95 Club if you desire)
After 12 weeks of actions, take a week off to review and course correct

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Servant Leadership Is Excellent

Fri, 08 Jan 2021 20:00:36 GMT

What if everything was upside down?

You know the typical organizational chart. You know the concept of "top-down" decision-making. You understand when people have people "under" them. You know what I mean when I say someone "works their way up in the company."

But I want to suggest a radical shift to a more servant leadership style. It has to start with the structure or it will never work. I think the org chart should be turned on its head.

The traditional org chart was part of the industrial revolution which treated people as cogs in a system. The assembly line was their workspace. If someone was slow, it was easy to simply pull the slow worker out and put in a faster one.

But we are in the service era. A top-down approach simply isn't excellent. It promotes the use of humans as resources (like a stock of steel or wood). Notice the term, "Human Resources". HR has become so ingrained, that it is commonly referred to. Yet it subtly implies humans are to be treated like a block of steel or wood.

With an upside-down org chart, you make decisions "bottom-up". If you're a leader, you have people "above" you. If you want to take on more responsibility, you work your way "down" the company. All of these perspectives support one fundamental aspect of excellent business: servant leadership.

A s you work your way "down" the company, you take on more weight (responsibility. You have more people "above" you and your success is dependent on their success. To the extent you are not supportive, the whole group above you collapses.

ACTION STEP

I'm interested in what you have to say about this idea of an upside down org chart. I welcome your input.

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The Power Of Suspension

Thu, 07 Jan 2021 15:25:18 GMT

"Even a wise man knows doubt from time to time. It is the fool who allows it to rule his judgement." Jennifer Hudock

There is great power in being in the liminal state, a threshold where one thing has died or ended, and something else has yet to begin.

It's that "in between" place, that place where you think you know what's coming down the road, but because you don't suspend your judgment, you lose the ability to see what is much greater coming at you. And you miss it altogether. It's called suspending judgment .

Rather than me explain this, watch this video clip:

(Here's a link to the video if you need it: https://youtu.be/hFewdHqb_z4 )

So you see that the judges in this Switzerland's Got Talent judged too soon. All four of them said "no" to the contestant's act. And yet, you saw the result of what a tremendous piece of artwork she was creating.

What does this mean for you and your excellence?

I don't need to tell you how the pandemic has caused a lot of endings in this past year. And here we sit at the threshold between what will be known as " remember 2020" and a new year (still with uncertain outcomes). We are hoping like crazy 2021 is not a repeat of 2020.

As a person of excellence (someone who has committed yourself to the act of becoming the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design) possess this ability to suspend judgment and allow something brand new to emerge. Something that despite all your thinking and your strategizing, you still really see it happening. And if you try to force something to happen, you forfeit what could be something much greater than you ever dreamed.

As a fixer, I need it more than most. Perhaps you can relate. When we see a problem, we want to fix it. And we don't suspend our judgment long enough. We have to work at this. Will you commit with me to being the open to the excellence that is waiting to emerge, rather than try and force it?

ACTION STEP

Suspend judgment

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Practical Excellence

Tue, 05 Jan 2021 13:36:52 GMT

Being excellent means being yourself.

I'm toying with an adjustment with this blog. In November of 2020, I felt it would be wise to commit to writing a blog post every day for a year. Sounded good at the time. My aim was to force myself to flesh out the particulars of a book I had in my mind that was all about the art of excellence. Except for a day or two missed, I was able to keep to the commitment for over 2 months now.

But as I continue, I learn more about the best use of time. I want to help as many people as I can with my experiences, successes, and failures. I ultimately want to serve a couple dozen clients over a lifetime. That's my aim and that's the reason I wanted to write that book - to be a sort of platform for discussions with you, my reader, and, if I am fortunate enough, you my client.

I'm not saying I'll stop blogging. I'm just thinking about how it all fits into the overall picture.

The thoughts above the line are an example of authenticity. I'm processing what's in my mind to show you what real excellence can look like. It will be different for you, but here are the main points I want to get across to you.

ELEMENTS OF PRACTICAL EXCELLENCE

Be willing to abandon old ideas . Life is not static. If you aren't dynamic, you'll get run over by the next great idea
Be courageous to keep what's working . Remember, don't abandon for the sake of abandonment. If it's working, keep doing it
Be disciplined enough to test what's working . Even if something is working, it doesn't mean it's the best thing to be doing. It may be the proverbial "good in the way of great."

ACTION STEP

List everything you're doing.
Evaluate what things are hold-outs of old ideas and which are working.
Stop the old ideas
Test what's working

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Barriers and Constraints

Mon, 04 Jan 2021 12:43:17 GMT

Knowing the difference between barriers and constraints gives you the knowledge to succeed.

You want to become the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design, right? Well, it won't happen on its own. It will require work on your part. That's the good news. What's the bad?

You will encounter obstacles in your path. To help deal with these obstacles, it will help to break them down into two categories: Barriers and Constraints. They both share common traits and have unique traits.

Some of the common characteristics among barriers and constraints - Both generate from within us as well as externally. Both require work to overcome. Both require your creativity to overcome them. Both keep you from achieving your desired outcome.

Some of the differences between barriers and constraints - Barriers are removeable. They are as temporary as you allow them to be, based on how you handle them. Constraints are immoveable. They are permanent and cannot be changed. Whereas you overcome barriers, you compensate for constraints.

Here are a couple examples:

An example of a barrier - scarcity mindset. You are not doomed to a life of worrying about how limited you are. You can overcome this mindset with techniques that, over time and with practice, overcome it and live with an abundant mindset.

An example of a constraint - poor eyesight. If you were born with poor eyesight, there is little can can be done to overcome it. Although this cannot be overcome, it can be compensated for with glasses or contact lenses.

HOW TO OVERCOME BARRIERS

Identify if it is truly a barrier. You don't want to spend all your time trying to change something that cannot be changed. But beware, don't sell yourself short and call a barrier a constraint when it's truly a barrier. You may not think it can be overcome at first.

Identify all the possible actions necessary to overcome the barrier.

Select the "atomic actions" (the 20% of possible actions that yield 80% of your ability to overcome)

Commit to those atomic actions with someone you trust. Then meet weekly to check in with them on those actions.

HOW TO COMPENSATE FOR CONSTRAINTS

Identify if it is truly a constraint. You don't want to spend al your time trying to compensate for something that can be removed completely.

Identify all the possible actions necessary to compensate for the constraint.

Select the "atomic actions" (the 20% of possible actions that yield 80% of your ability to compensate)

Commit to those atomic actions with someone you trust. Then meet weekly to check in with them on those actions.

Knowing the difference between barriers and constraints gives you proper guidance on how to proceed. Armed with the difference, you are in a position to act accordingly. It's like understanding your enemy. Now you can do something about it.

ACTION STEP

Make a list of all things that keep you from succeeding at becoming the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design
Classify them as either barriers (what can be overcome) and constraints (what cannot be overcome but compensated for)

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Distraction or Opportunity?

Sun, 03 Jan 2021 18:46:30 GMT

You could be missing a key point when it comes to distractions.

Maybe it's because I'm staring at my 60th birthday which is coming up in a few short years. Or maybe it's just my disgust at seeing all of the time and money being left on the table due to distracting interruptions. I don't want to waste another minute of my life nor another dollar of my hard-earned money. Would you agree?

DISTRACTIONS

Historically, we have seen distractions as a bad thing. After all, what is a distraction? It's the opposite of traction. DIS-traction. I am really enjoying the quality posts being produced by Nir Eyal on his site, www.nirandfar.com. Take a look at what he says in this post:

"Distraction is a curse of modern life. Between our cell phones and computer screens, not to mention our kids and coworkers, our attention is constantly being diverted. It can become difficult to focus on any one task—or any one person—for very long.

"If anything, the world is becoming a more distracting place. Technology is becoming more pervasive and persuasive. But hoping tech companies change their ways and your boss finally learns to respect your time may take longer than you’re willing to wait. Better to equip yourself to manage distraction with strategies you can implement right away. After all, although distractions aren’t necessarily your fault, managing them is your responsibility." ( source )

Here's where I think we may be mission a key point in the discussion regarding distractions. I'll summarize in two main observations:

Not all distractions are truly distractions
What matters is not so much the distractions but what we do when distracted

NOT ALL DISTRACTIONS ARE DISTRACTIONS

Beware, not all distractions are in fact distractions. And I might add, what is distracting to me is not necessarily distracting to you and vice versa. We miss the point when we lump all interruptions into the same category. When we do that, we jump to conclusions and miss the rich new awareness that an interruptions may hold.

For example, let's say I'm trying to figure out the solution to a problem one of my clients is wrestling with. It's taking all my mental capacity and I'm getting tired. Suddenly a child interrupts me with the knock on my door. She's selling Girl Scout cookies. You might think this is further keeping me from being part of my client's solution. But wait, there's more going on.

First of all, the child's exchange of lemon filled cookies for a few bucks has given my mind time to rest from the engagement of the problem at hand. It's like putting down the weights for a moment or two between reps. The muscles have a chance to catch up.

Secondly, let's surmise that something occurred in the exchange of cookies for dollars that contained the very essence of the client's solution.

Now, was the child's interruption a distraction? I think not.

IT MATTERS HOW DISTRACTIONS ARE HANDLED

When a potential distraction comes to you, it matters what you do with it. The sooner you can determine if it's truly a distraction and not an opportunity, the sooner you can take the necessary steps. Here is a subtle but power shift in the questioning you can use when a new thought or suggestion comes along:

Don't ask "yes/no" questions. They constrict your options. When you ask, "Is this a distraction?", you only have 2 options. Either you determine it is a distraction or it's not. That's it. Even though it may in fact be a distraction, you could be missing hidden parts of the distraction that can be useful for your journey.

Instead, ask "how" questions. For example, when you ask, "How could this distract me from my objectives?" or "How could this contribute to my journey?" you can see how many more options open up to you.

Of course, it helps a great deal to already have a sense for where you're headed. That way, you have a backdrop to evaluate opportunities and distractions with greater clarity.

ACTION STEP

List the top 3 distractions you typically fight along your journey of excellence.
Take another look at them and ask yourself, "How could this help me in my journey?"

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Solopreneurship and Your ZOE

Thu, 31 Dec 2020 16:29:57 GMT

Key questions of applied ZOE

ZOE ( Zone of Excellence ) has various applications for both personal and professional life. So, what does ZOE look like for a Solopreneur? First, we must understand applied ZOE in a professional setting. In the professional world ZOE is made up of a combination of four key areas. They are the things that: you must do, must be done on your own, you are good at doing, and you enjoy. Once you are operating within the four key areas, you know that you are in your ZOE.

For Solopreneurs, these areas will likely look different than they do for a CEO of a larger corporation. Rather than having the ability to delegate the things not within the four areas of your ZOE, you must instead select things that do fall in your applied ZOE and relinquish things that don’t.

So what does this look like in a practical sense? Say you’re a web designer who works with clients daily. You receive a inquiry from a potential client who wants you to design a website for them, but they also want you to set up and maintain their social media presence. The four areas of applied ZOE allow you to ask questions to determine if this assignment fits within your ZOE.

What needs to be accomplished?
Am I the only one who can do it?
Is it within my skillset?
Will I enjoy it?

The requirement for the position is web design (your skill set) and social media marketing (not an area where you are skilled). You were not the only candidate who applied for the bid, so you may assume that there are other candidates who could do the job. You are skilled with web design, but your social media marketing skills are not as strong. You know before you accept the position that once the web design is completed you will not enjoy the remainder of the role. After weighing the client project against your four ZOE questions, you know that it is not the right fit.

As a Solopreneur, it’s even more important that you ask yourself these questions BEFORE you move forward with a project, a partner, or a client. As you are unable to delegate work to a staff member, you must make selections that fit into your ZOE. As you offload clients/projects that do not fit into your ZOE and add clients/projects that do, you will begin to see your progression towards your ZOE.

Action Step

Test your current business/projects against the four applied ZOE questions. How do your projects stack up?
Measure any future clients/projects against the four applied ZOE questions.
Consider writing the four applied ZOE questions on a sticky note and keeping them somewhere visible as a reminder to utilize them.

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Full Versus False Expression

Wed, 30 Dec 2020 14:49:20 GMT

Assets over-accentuated become liabilities.

I am a recovering perfectionist. Let me share my story.

I have always loved spreadsheets, drawers, compartments, and file folders. I find comfort in them. They are where I am most at peace. This may sound delusional to you, especially if you're more of a free thinker. But it's where I find my core, my zone.

It started with one of my first jobs - bussing tables. I worked for a busy hometown Dutch restaurant that was packed out on Saturday nights with a long line that extended out the door and up the sidewalk. It was hot, loud, and hard work. I would wheel the cart up to a used table and go to it. All the silverware went in one place, all the trash in another, plates, and cups. I would try to time myself for how quickly I could get the table ready for another patron. I understood that an empty table was tied directly to the bottom line. I loved that job. In fact, I've uttered many times, " If I could have raised a family of 4 on the salary, I'd just as soon buss tables all my life. " .

This love of organization has served me well over the years. I have been able to get a lot accomplished. I took this "bussing tables" approach to my role as Chief Operating Officer, Life Coach, and now Business Consultant/Leadership Coach.

But I have been on the dark side of having an aptitude for organization. It's called perfectionism. It's not fun to live as a perfectionist. It's not fun for those who live with a perfectionist. You see, being organized is an asset for me. But taken too far, organization can become perfectionism - a liability. It's organization at its extremes.

When we talk about the definition of excellence as " Becoming the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design ", we are not talking about taking your design to its extremes. I call that "false expression".

What ARE we talking about when we say "fullest expression"?

I was on a call just this morning with a client and we were talking about liminal space, the swing from engagement and release, and less is more. During that conversation I was made aware of the delicate, yet powerful, nuance to "full expression". It's less programmed and more art. It's recognizing the tendency to take what is a unique gift or ability too far. It's having respect for the uniqueness. It's about looking for early warning signs that you're approaching the liability phase.

How DO you fully express your unique design without it becoming an overbearing liability?

The answer to the art form of full expression is reflection . Daily stepping back and disengaging from the push to notice what's going on around you. Do a little download of all that's in your mind. Reflect on it all and see if there are any signs of "false expression". We want "FULL expression" not "FALSE expression."

ACTION STEP

Create a definition of what full expression is for your unique design
Create a top 10 list of signs that your full expression is becoming false expression
Keep these handy for our daily reflection times (preferably first thing in the morning)

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The 90-Day Sprint

Tue, 29 Dec 2020 19:39:38 GMT

Slow and steady wins the race...

WHAT IS A 90-DAY SPRINT?

It's a 13-week period of time where you focus on a few specific actions in the midst of your normal life to accomplish a specific milestone as part of an overall life plan.

The 13 weeks are broken into two phases. Phase One is the ACTION phase. It lasts 12 out of the 13 weeks. Phase two is the REVIEW phase. It takes place on the 13th week.

Although you may be accustomed to think in terms of quarters of the year, you don't have to fit within those times. You can start today and go out 13 weeks.

WHAT ARE THE BENEFITS OF A 90-DAY SPRINT?

It's not so short that you miss experiencing a pattern of success.

It's not too long that you lose interest and give up.

It creates a weekly cadence where you measure your progress with another person or group.

WHAT MAKES A 90-DAY SPRINT SUCCESSFUL?

Be clear on the milestone you desire at the end of 13 weeks. Although your milestone could be a stand alone goal, it's better when you are pursuing a milestone that fits into a bigger game plan.

Don't try to do too much. If you do, you will inevitably fail, leaving you discouraged and you'll want to quit altogether. Instead, pick just 2 to 3 actions that will carry the lion's share of your progress toward your desired milestone.

Engage with someone to check in on a weekly basis. According to research, by having someone to check in with and a regular appointment, you increase your chances of reaching your desired milestone by 95%. Be sure to check in with the same person(s) on the same day of the week at the same time and place, if possible.

On week 13, do a review of the previous 12 weeks of action. Ask, "What did I learn about myself and my goal?" With what you learned, see what you can course correct and start another sprint with what you now know.

NOTE: If you want to take advantage of a program that provides this sort of framework, check out www.servingstrong.com/95

WHO ARE 90-DAY SPRINTS FOR?

The person who is upset enough with the status quo that they are ready to change. In other words, when the pain of change is less than the pain of staying the same.

The person who is humble enough to be willing to check in with another person.

If you are serious about life change amid a very uncertain time and you want to ensure the probability of success by 95%, a 90-Day Sprint, with the weekly check-in, can be just what you need.

If you want to plug into an economical program you can use to assist you in your change efforts, visit www.servingstrong.com/95 for details.

ACTION STEP

Pick a milestone or goal. It can be anything you want to accomplish (within reason)
Set a start date and end date exactly 13 weeks out
Ask a trusted advisor to meet with briefly on a weekly basis to check in on your progress
Journal every week how it's going
On week 13, ask yourself what you learned about yourself and your desired outcome

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How To Assess Excellence

Mon, 28 Dec 2020 11:55:13 GMT

One weekly question is all it takes

You and I have at least one thing in common. We both wake up to another day. It’s something that has been ingrained in us since birth. A new day means waking from our sleep and starting the day.

This waking has become a routine for you. Some days you may wake later than others but the routine still stands.

I bet you haven’t yet gone a whole day without waking (unless you were seriously hospitalized, in which case would be very unusual circumstances.)

So with that routine firmly established, I propose a question that you can ask yourself that will quickly give you a general, overall assessment of the level of excellence you are experiencing in your life. Here’s the question:

On a scale of 1-10,

how eager have you been

to wake up and face the day?

(1 being very much not eager and 10 being very eager)

Even if you are not be a morning person, the question still remains. Even if you don’t like waking, what is your level of eagerness to get to the things and people and responsibilities of your life? I believe it's possible to have a hard time waking and still be eager to get going on what makes your heart sing.

The key is not to pivot your life based on one answer. Ask yourself this question weekly. If you are in the 1-5 range over weeks and weeks, something needs to change.

Excellence produces a sense of purpose in your life. Even when the road is hard and you don’t look forward to waking, there is still an eagerness to keep going because you are so tuned into your purpose.

ACTION STEP

Make a commitment to assess your eagerness over the past 7 days every Sunday night. After 4 or 5 weeks, take an average.
If you need to change something to get your numbers above 5, let’s talk. Email me at coach@servingstrong.com

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Drawing the Lines

Fri, 25 Dec 2020 21:00:04 GMT

Your blueprint for excellence

Excellence is like anything else in life, it takes time, energy, and preparation to achieve. Think of your excellence strategy in building terms. Luke 14:28 says, “For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it?”. When we think of “building” excellence in our own lives, the logical first step is to sit down and plan out our journey to excellence.

While every journey of excellence begins with a want (desire), it is sustained by a framework that sets a direction with intention. When starting out, the concepts are fuzzy and require time to be unveiled, as new information and experience give detail to the overall master plan. So, take a moment to consider your master plan of excellence. What does the big picture look like – your ZOE (Zone of Excellence)? Do you see where you are headed, 5, 10, or even 20 years down the road?

Once you’ve established your master plan for excellence, it’s time to put together the blueprint. This allows you to map out the structure that will surround your journey to excellence. As you start the blueprint process it may seem vague or not as detailed as you would like for it to be. Adding details to your blueprint (think of how bedrooms, closets, and kitchens are mapped out in an architectural blueprint) will allow you to visualize the big picture more fully. Without the details, you don’t have an actual plan, it’s just an idea.

By adding detail to your excellence blueprint, your vision transitions to a rendering. You start to see the real and achievable steps toward your ZOE. Your vision becomes more than just a floor plan of ideas, it becomes a map for your journey. As you put the plan to action and begin your journey of excellence, consider this the actual building portion in your pursuit of excellence. This is the point where your mission and values become important. For this analogy, your mission would be the type of construction and your values would be the materials that you will be incorporating. You can also think of this as the area in which you are pursuing excellence and the tools that you will use to accomplish your goal.

Excellence doesn’t simply happen overnight; it takes time and effort. Planning your blueprint of excellence is the first step of the journey and as you establish that blueprint, the rest of the plans will begin to fit in that framework.

Action step:

Set aside time to begin putting together your master plan. What does excellence look like in your current role? What does your ZOE look like in the next 5, 10, or 20 years?
After you’ve identified your master plan, begin to map out your blueprint. What does your general journey look like?
Add details and finalize your plan rendering. Rather than considering your rendering inflexible, use it as a guideline. Make the steps of your rendering achievable and then consider your next steps as you begin your journey of excellence.
Decide how you will accomplish your goals and what tools you will use along your journey (remember your mission and values?).
Don’t wait to start your journey of excellence. Each day offers the potential to getting closer to reaching your ZOE.

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Real Personal Growth

Thu, 24 Dec 2020 13:15:02 GMT

There is a gap and it's utterly unnecessary.

I Googled the word “stress” the other day and up popped 1,270,000,000 results in 0.62 seconds. The first page of results covered topics such as

What are the symptoms of stress?
How does stress affect the body?
What are 5 emotional signs of stress?
How does stress happen?
How can I stop stressing?
What are the 3 causes of stress?

I further Googled the phrase, “ How many people die from stress? ” and among the top results of the 552,000,000 results was a statistic that said, “ The American Institute of Stress reports 120,000 people die every year as a direct result of work-related stress. Additionally, healthcare costs resulting from work-related stress totals an average of $190 billion a year .” ( source )

The age in which we live is most amazing. Literally at our fingertips is a world of knowledge curated on one screen based on any topic we wish to dig into.2 However, the number of people who suffer and die from stress indicate that this wealth of knowledge that is instantly and ubiquitously accessible is not the answer. The problem with stress (and pretty much any other topic) is not for lack of information, but a lack of implementation .

Imagine looking at two cliffs with a valley between. On the cliff to the left is the “Information Cliff”. On the cliff to the right is the “Implementation Cliff”. In the middle between the two cliffs is the gap. It’s an open space that houses the missing link. What we need is a way to bridge the gap between the wealth of information and the power of solid implementation.

I propose a 5-step system for bridging this gap between the available information and your own personal implementation. This system is designed to help you leverage the information for your own personal growth and development.

THE 5-STEP SYSTEM FOR CLARITY AND EXECUTION

Let’s use the example of stress and assume for the moment that you have a real problem with it. Stress is impacting you physically, emotionally, and making your relationships difficult. Let’s further assume you are facing a brand-new year and would really like this new year to be the year you finally overcome stress.

The 5-step system houses two main points: Clarity and Execution. You must first generate clarity on the topic before you can execute with any significance upon the right problem. Clarity involves steps 1, 2, and 5. Execution involves steps 3 and 4.

The following graphic summarizes the 5-step system of Clarity and Execution:

Let’s now cover each of the 5 steps.

Step 1 to real personal growth: DOWNLOAD

[This is a clarify step.] First, you verbally process everything that's in your head. Get it all out on paper (or the screen). Don’t worry about grammar, punctuation, or that thoughts must be coherent. Just get everything in your mind out of your mind. This is called "Downloading".

Downloading immediately provides an instant sense of relief because you now know the extent of what's been flying around in your head (at least for the time being). This puts the locus of control back where it belongs - inside of you. Plus, with everything out, you are now positioned to start dividing.

Step 2 to real personal growth: DIVIDE

[This is a clarify step.] Okay, so you can't get anywhere just staring at the sheet of paper (or screen) with all those random thoughts written down. Now, you separate all the thoughts into systems by affinity. This is called "Dividing". For a systematic method that works well with my clients, I use the following 6 systems (think systems in the body that work independently of one another yet work together interrelatedly to make up a healthy human being.) Those systems are:

Spiritual
Relational
Financial
Emotional
Physical
Vocational

The Divide step positions you firmly on the balcony looking over the entire dance floor with all the dance moves categorized.

Step 3 to real personal growth: DISSEMINATE

[This is an execution step.] After Downloading and Dividing, you are ready to map out a journey of execution. This is called "Disseminating". This is where you brainstorm all the possible goals and related actions you could commit to doing so that you move in the direction of fullest learning, growth, and development.

Out of that list, you need to select the 20% of goals that will yield 80% of the difference and make a commitment to act on them. This is because you simply will not have time to implement every idea.

Step 4 to real personal growth: DAILY

[This is an execution step.] No amount of inspiration, intention, or passion will make something you desire become reality. In the end, it will always (repeat, always) come down to the daily walk. So, what do I mean by the walk?

The walk is you acting on the actions you committed to while tackling everything else you must face in life (aka your whirlwind). The walk is the cable that connects you from where you are right now to where you want to be. It's your anchor. It's what keeps you steadily moving forward toward your goals in the midst of the whirlwind.

The walk (or cable) consists of one 90-day sprint after another. A sprint is a 13-week journey. For 12 weeks, you act on the actions, checking in weekly with someone you’ve chosen to keep you true to your commitments. On the 13th week you review and adjust going forward (which is the fifth and final step, Dig).

Step 5 to real personal growth: DIG

[ This is a clarify step.] This is where the magic happens. Well, it's all magic, but this is where you solidify your progress. It's where you dig for the gold. When you begin your 90-sprint during the DAILY step, you don’t know what you know after you complete a 90-day sprint. You learned about yourself, your design, your mission. It's a rich amount of information that you can use to parlay into the next 90-sprint.

By taking what you learned and applying it to course correct and create a greater focus on the expression of your design, you are pulling your goals toward you. You're bending time!

CONCLUSION

The powerful thing about the 5-step system is that it is dynamic enough to help you leverage the constant flow and speed of change in life. It’s by no means constrictive. You will learn every day, every week, every month. And with the DIG step, you will deepen your clarity for the purpose of executing effectively.

Along the journey, as you get stuck, you can always engage again in steps 1 & 2, Downloading and Dividing again. The more you download, the more information you have available to propel yourself forward in growth and development (something I call, “The fullest expression of your unique, God-given design.”) Over time, you will see patterns, trends, opportunities, and blind spots you never saw before. Think of this information like a set of “big data” on your life from which you can create your very own personal algorithm of growth.

If this is something you might be interested in looking at in more depth, visit www.servingstrong.com/steps

or contact Scott Couchenour at coach@servingstrong.com

NOTE: Even in an age of false and misleading news, the numbers of results on any search and the numbers used in the example of stress-related deaths present a staggering illustration of the missing link between the information and the implementation.

ACTION STEP

Try working with the 5-step system for 30 days and let me know what you think (coach@servingstrong.com)

Why Clarity Is Important

Wed, 23 Dec 2020 16:49:32 GMT

"There are few things more powerful than a life lived with passionate clarity." Erwin McManus

Organizational Clarity

First let's talk about what clarity is not . When there is no clarity your business is vague, and obscure. It's like trying to drive in the rain without wearing your contacts. How fun is it to work in a vague business? How fun is it to talk with a vague person?

By contrast, the best run companies are best because they are clear. They are clear on the mission, purpose, and values. They are clear on their value to the market. They are clear on their cost to do business. They are clear on their long and short-term initiatives and key performance indicators.

The difference between Positive and Negative Mystery

Positive Mystery is like asking, “How in the world can 75,750 gallons of water fall per second over the American and bridal veil Falls? And how can that happen day after day, year after year, decade after decade?” This type of question has more to do with our wonder and awe at mystery. It engages the soul and spirit. Positive Mystery is possible when you are already clear about a lot of things.

Negative Mystery is like asking, “How in the world can we keep getting into this cash flow crunch?” or “Why did I explode it Mary when she told me the project was running behind?” or “Why is one of our best clients taking their business to our competitor?” Because you forgot to get back to them with the answer to their question 3 times in a row, that’s why. Negative mystery comes from a lack of clarity.

For the business, clarity means profit.

Clarity is effective efficiency. This means the right tasks are being done in the right way by the right people at the right time for the right reasons. Effective efficiency makes work simple, not complex. Notice I didn't say easy. Work will always be hard. There will be those days your mother warned you about. But work that is unnecessarily complex is fatiguing. Effective efficiency is leveraged time. And time is money.

By the way, for the individual, clarity means fulfillment. When I am clear on where I'm headed and what it takes for me to succeed, I am more engaged in the moment today while lessening the number of regrets I will face tomorrow.

ACTION STEP

Define your “ignition questions” (after everyone else has left the office and you’re the last to leave because you own the company and just as you’re putting your key in the ignition to start the car and drive home, what are the key questions you must have the answers to?)

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Are You A Thermostat Leader?

Tue, 22 Dec 2020 20:13:06 GMT

One of the most important duties of your leadership is the regulation of anxiety.

Your staff members have anxieties they bring to the job. Every one of your staff is different. Some have enough anxiety to keep them on their game. Others, not so much. Regardless, their anxiety influences the role they play in your organization. Let's address your role as leader of individuals who are all hired to bring about a certain outcome for which they are paid.

First, a few elements:

INFLUENCE
Since you lead, your influence is inevitable. Your influence has no on/off button. It just is, period. Every word you speak, every attitude you display, every emotion, reaction, tone of voice, look... it's all fair game in your life as the leader. You have to be on your game at all times, no exceptions. Your life as leader carries a lot of weight. You lead in many areas. Your home, your organization, your marketplace, your church, your local community, your online community, and pretty much anywhere you exist.

SELF-AWARENESS
Having this kind of always-on leadership requires deep self-awareness. Self-awareness is the capacity to see your interactions from a bird's eye view. It's how an individual consciously knows and understands their own character, feelings, motives, and desires. When you have this capacity, you can understand how your emotions are impacted by circumstances. The more self-aware, the quicker you are able to see what's going on and regulate.

REGULATION
Regulation is the ability control or maintain the rate or speed so that things operate properly. For example, a hormone regulates metabolism and organ function.

ANXIETY
Anxiety is a strange thing. It can be your greatet asset or your greatest liability. It's necessary as it fuels just the right amount of fear to create movement. Hard work is not something that comes naturally to us unless the pain of change becomes less than the pain of the status quo.

THERMOSTAT LEADERSHIP

So here's the principle that, if you can master it, will become your go-to behavior whenever you need to light a fire under a staff member, or talk them off a cliff. It's called Thermostat Leadership, and many leaders simply don't use it because they don't get it. They're too busy fighting the tendency to be "one of the guys", rather than engage with individual staff members' to get to truly know them and offer a little well-timed, well-placed advice. This advice you give does one of two things: regulate anxiety UP or regulate anxiety DOWN.

When a staff member is high on anxiety, it's time for you to turn down the temperature. Give them an empathetic ear when they're sharing their struggle with you. Offer advice only as a last resort. Mainly ask open-ended questions that draw your staff member out of their own heads. That way, they'll begin to see their anxiety from a broader perspective and feel better about that. A good resource to become better at this kind of conversation is The Coaching Habit .

When a staff member is low on anxiety, it's time for you to turn up the temperature. In this scenario, you're doing a little more of the talking and showing, by illustration, how important the staff person's role and results are to the overall mission. Be sure to communicate a clear line of attachment between what they were hired to do and how it enables your organization to achieve its mission.

ACTION STEP

Take a quick inventory of each staff member's level of anxiety
Decide who needs to be regulated down and who needs to be regulated up
Set up a zoom call with each one and start thermostat leading

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Break It Down

Sun, 20 Dec 2020 12:56:44 GMT

Don't tell your plans. Show your results.

The expression of who you are and what you stand for is what the world absolutely needs. It's your great and glorious impact. You are one of billions alive on this earth. The one thing that sets you apart from all the others is you.

Let no one impose their design on the design that was uniquely created just for you. One of the greatest regrets of the dying, according to conversations with those who knew they had only two weeks to live, was that they were not true to who they were. They tried all their lives to be what they felt other people wanted them to be.

So this great and glorious impact. Where do you start?

DREAM BIG

Start with a big dream. The bigger the better. Extract any thoughts of "how" when you're dreaming. In the dreaming, there are no limits of time, money, resources, talent, or energy. When you get done dreaming your big dream, take it to another level. It's likely not big enough. The bigger the dream, the greater the possibilities that you will see the real impact you can have.

The dream is just the beginning. It gets you going in a direction - any direction. The key to remember is that at this stage, it doesn't matter so much where you're headed, but that you have the car moving. It's always easier to steer a car where it needs to go when it's moving, than when it's stationary.

BREAK IT DOWN

So take this big dream and start breaking it down. Reverse engineer it. In James Clear's words, "decide the type of person you want to be and prove it to yourself with small wins." Any large task, when broken down into doable tasks, can be accomplished. So, take a look at your current way of doing things. Compare that to your big dream and ask these key questions:

What needs to be added to what you're already doing?
What needs to stop happening?
What needs to change?
What can stay the same?

Take one of the bullet points above and make a list.

Take one item from the list and break it down into smaller tasks, step by step.

Continue breaking it down until you have tasks that you feel you can accomplish.

Stick with me over time. We'll take a look at this process in more depth. But for now, you need to understand one key principle:

Just because you have a plan all broken down into doable tasks, doesn't mean it's magically going to happen on its own. You still need to execute those tasks.

CHECK IN

You will increase your probability of success by 95% if you have a regular check in with someone to whom you've committed your actions. This is backed by research and it know it to be true personally and I've seen it happen in the lives of my clients.

ACTION STEP

Do you have someone to whom you can commit and meet to check in? If you don't and want to make a significant impact on at least the next 90 days, check out THE 95 CLUB .

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Spiritual Excellence (A Resource List)

Sat, 19 Dec 2020 04:36:07 GMT

"Our greatest fear should not be of failure but of succeeding at things in life that don’t really matter." - Francis Chan

From time to time I like to curate and share resources I find online that address one of the 6 systems (spiritual, relational, financial, emotional, physical, and vocational).

This post is dedicated to the Spiritual system. I hope you find inspiration and guidance in your journey of excellence (the becoming of the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design.)

7 Reassuring Prayers for Relief during Times of Crisis

A Prayer for Times of Crisis — Psalm 46

The Gospel in Times of Crisis

7 Ways COVID-19 Can Grow Our Spiritual Fortitude

The Bible

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Looking Beyond Yourself

Thu, 17 Dec 2020 18:11:07 GMT

The outward mindset of excellence

The term outward mindset can be simplified as thinking beyond yourself. Dig deeper and you find that it’s really an underlying attitude that your design was meant not to serve self, but to serve others. In faith circles, an outward mindset leadership style is often called servant leadership. It finds roots in humility and often manifests in a willingness to put the needs of employees first and to share or delegate authority.

An outward mindset allows desires of self-service to be placed below the needs of an organization, coworkers, business partners, and goals. It’s a practice that develops over time. You may never reach a perfected outward mindset, but as you exercise selflessness, others around you will begin not only to be impacted by your commitment to serving others but may also develop their own outward mindset.

In business, an outward mindset can work from the top-down. Offering an other’s-centric model in the workplace will change the dynamic of your operation. If your entire team begins to work with an outward mindset your clients will benefit, meaning that your business will benefit. The benefit of an outward mindset or servant leadership is that everyone feels valued, beginning with your staff and flowing down to your clients. In return, business grows, and you may also reap the benefits of your outward mindset.

In an article by the Arbinger Institute , the author encourages leaders not to wait until they have perfected the outward mindset before encouraging subordinates to also practice it. Their reasoning is that you may be waiting a long time or you may never reach a perfected state. The article encourages the reader not to let a lapse hurt your progress. They share that everyone lapses in their other’s-focused mindset from time to time. So, what are some steps to practicing an outward mindset?

Action Step:

Read more of the Arbinger Institute’s articles on outward mindset.
Make a list of ways that you can begin to practice an outward mindset in the office or in your personal life.
Don’t get discouraged when you lapse in your outward mindset progress. Keep moving forward.
Encourage your team to implement the steps above.

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The Whirlwind

Wed, 16 Dec 2020 13:45:02 GMT

If destruction fails to entangle us, distraction will do it's best.

(Beth Moore)

Ever notice when you set out to make a significant change in your life, that life itself seems to get crazy? It's like life knows when you're trying to be more intentional and does everything in its power to stop you. That's the whirlwind.

The whirlwind is made of the stuff of life:

the car breaks down
there are bills to pay
the lawn needs cut
groceries need to be ordered
there's that zoom session at 1pm today
and why did you agree to lead a men's prayer breakfast online?

Sometimes the whirlwind is made of seasons:

you are writing a book
your mother passed away
the neighbor down the road just had a housefire
you are starting a new business

Sometimes the whirlwind catches you off guard. Sometimes it's just the humdrum parts of living life in a fallen world. Nothing good or bad about it, it's just stuff. It is unpredictable, sometimes frenzied, potentially distracting.

Now contrast that to your journey of excellence.

This journey, like any significant endeavor, comes down to the walk. You are doing a few specific tasks on a regular basis that will lead to the outcome you desire. If you aren't aware of it by now, leading a life of excellence where you are becoming the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design does not come easy. But you can make it a lot simpler with this visual:

Imagine this walk like pulling yourself along a cable. Hand over hand, you are getting closer and closer, week by week, action by action. Now, add the whirlwind. As you are pulling yourself along the cable, the wind is whipping you around.

Your journey of excellence is the most significant work you will do in your lifetime. It impacts your impact. It is possible to become so distracted by the whirlwind that you reach a certain age, look back, and wonder how you could have wasted so much time. But it is also quite possible to maintain progress in the midst of the whirlwind. There may be times when the progress slows to a crawl (like if you lose a loved one), but you can still keep moving.

I heard a phrase among the running community when I was training for a marathon once:

If you can't sprint, jog.

If you can't jog, walk.

If you can't walk, crawl

- relentless forward motion.

Even in the midst of your whirlwind, however intense it may be, you can still make progress on your desired outcome. And over time, you will be becoming the fullest expression of your unique design - that's the journey of excellence. Check out the tips I've added to the Action Step section.

ACTION STEP

Keep your actions simple . Don't make the granular part of your journey so complicated that you have to think long and hard before acting.
Reflect more . Perhaps you've heard me say this before, but I cannot overemphasize the importance of reflection time. Ideally first thing in the morning and last thing at night. This gives you unpressured time to look over the landscape of your journey.
Build in margin time . Carve out specific time to perform the actions you set out to accomplish. Make them appointments on your calendar, not items on your to do list.

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Case Study: Meet Ken

Tue, 15 Dec 2020 20:00:02 GMT

Consistent excellent leadership is daunting.

Ken is a 40-something with 3 small children at home. He is a successful entrepreneur who has had a rough start but persevered. Through his hard work, he got the flywheel turning and is enjoying the fruits of his labor. By all appearances, one would say he was a success.

However, Ken has been struggling a bit lately.

He's not been enjoying the business as much. His feeling of discontentment is getting noticed by his wife and kids. He seems distant at times in the evenings. He recently snapped at the kids, which he has never done before.

The reason is because his business doesn't seem to be going as well as it has since he started it. He used to have it all covered. The new sales were growing and he loved going after the next big deal. But now he's been spending more time servicing these new customers and can't get out and sell like he loves to do.

He's read the book The E-Myth. He brought on an assistant and she's working out well. But still he's the only one who can do the things for the customers that they need. He's been distant at home because he's wrestling in his mind with thoughts like:

"Should I risk bringing on another person? "

"What if I drop the ball on one of my accounts?"

"How can I get back to doing the selling?"

"If I don't keep selling, how will I sustain business?"

Ken's tried many things to stay productive. He's in a Vistage group, and that's been good for networking and getting ideas. But when he comes back to the office, Ken is still wrestling with the day to day. He's tried using mobile apps to stay on top of tasks. He's invested in expensive business software that claims to streamline everything. All of it has fallen short of what he really needs.

Can You Relate?

Is are some of you in Ken's story? Can you relate to parts of it? All of it? If so, I'd like to introduce you to a 5-Step system for increasing your confidence in the job you have to do to stay healthy, successful, and continue to grow personally. I'm not selling you on my 5-Step system here. I'm going to layout all the steps in this post for you to consider whether you can perform them on your own, with a coach, or with me.

5 STEPS TO EXCELLENT LEADERSHIP

Step One for Excellent Leadership: DOWNLOAD

Find someone you trust and verbally process everything that's in your head while the other person records your thoughts. This is called "Downloading". It immediately provides an instant sense of relief because you now know the extent of what's been flying around in your head (at least for the time being). This puts the locus of control back where it belongs - inside of you.

Step Two for Excellent Leadership: DIVIDE

Now, you and I both know you can't get anywhere just staring at the sheet of paper with all those random thoughts written down. So separate all the thoughts into systems by affinity. This is called "Dividing". I use a framework with the following "buckets" or systems: Spiritual, Relational, Financial, Emotional, Physical, and Vocational. This positions you firmly on the balcony looking over the entire dance floor.

Step Three for Excellent Leadership: DISSEMINATE

After Downloading and Dividing, you are prepared to map out a journey of execution. This is called "Disseminating". It's where you brainstorm all the possible goals and related actions you could commit to in order to move in the direction of fullest expression of your design. This will yield a lot of tasks and initiatives. The important thing to do at this point is to select the 20% of your brainstorm list that will yield 80% of the difference and make a commitment to act on them.

Step Four for Excellent Leadership: DAILY

It's important to point out that, no amount of inspiration, intention, or passion will make something you desire become reality. In the end, it will always come down to the daily walk.

What is the walk? The walk is you acting on the actions you committed to while tackling everything else you have to face in life (aka your whirlwind ). The walk is the cable that connects you from where you are right now to where you want to be. It's your anchor. It's what keeps you steadily moving forward toward your goals in the midst of the whirlwind . The walk consists of one 90-day sprint after another. A sprint is a 13-week journey. For 12 weeks, you act on the actions, checking in weekly.

Step Five for Excellent Leadership: DIG

This is not a linear process with a beginning and an end. Although one step builds on another, it's a cycle. While you're at Stage Four, daily executing on your actions, you'll need to do another Download. That's perfectly fine. In fact it's the accumulation of downloads that will begin to bless you with your own personal "big data". You'll be able to spot trends, patterns, and opportunities..

NOTE: Every trip around the steps means you are closer to your goals. There will be ups and downs. But it you stick to this process faithfully (the same process I use to build my business), you will most likely achieve greatness over the long haul.

ACTION STEP

Take out a sheet of paper and your favorite pen. Start jotting down some of the things you enjoy doing. Meet with a trusted friend and share your list with them, asking them to hold you responsible for the success of your 5-Step program.

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How To Succeed At New Year's Resolutions

Mon, 14 Dec 2020 12:26:33 GMT

New Year's resolutions require execution

What do you want?

I bet whatever it is, it fits into one of three areas: Health, Finances, or Personal Development.

Since we're coming up to the end of a year (and what a year it's been, no?), I thought I'd mention something that I believe with all my heart can be a tool for your success in the next year. I call it the 95 Club .

B ut first allow me to lay a foundation.

I Googled the word " stress " and I got over 1.1 billion results in a fraction of a second - all on the phone I was holding in the palm of my hand. Now, compare that to the statistics from The American Institute of Stress that indicate about 33 percent of people report feeling extreme stress. 77 percent of people experience stress that affects their physical health. And 73 percent of people have stress that impacts their mental health.

On one hand, 1.1 billion pieces of information on stress. Everything we need to know about stress and how to keep it from ruling our lives is instantly available. On the other hand statistics that clearly indicate a human condition with significant challenges with stress.

And stress isn't the only topic. Search the word " motivation " or the phrase " how to learn Spanish " or " how to change a flat tire ". Again, you'll have pretty much everything you need to know right in the palm of your hands. Yet so many struggle with motivation? So many people want to learn Spanish but don't know how or where to start? So many people suffer from an irrational fear that they'll be stuck in the middle of nowhere with a flat tire and no way to get it fixed?

Here's the main point:

The challenges we face are not for

a lack of information,

but a lack of implementation .

It's like we're sitting at the table of a great feast with all the trimmings and enough to completely fill our bellies and we sit there staring in our lap at the corner of a piece of bread.

So let me ask again, what do you want?

What have you tried to accomplish and started out with great intention, but the intensity faded and you ceased the effort? How many New Years resolutions have you started that never got much past February?

What if I told you your chances of success could improve by 95 percent? What if I told you that percentage is backed up by research?

Based on the work by the American Society of Training and Development, people are 65 percent likely to meet a goal or New Year's resolution after committing to another person. And their chances of success increase to 95 percent when they build in ongoing meetings with their partners to check in on their progress.

Introducing The 95 Club. It's a system where club members meet weekly to check in with a group of fellow goal seekers, led by a trained facilitator. Club members also have access to a growing library of resources and ongoing training, and more.

Now you could start the new year on your own and risk another disappointment again. Or you could give the 95 Club a try and set yourself up for a much greater probability that you could not only meet your goals but exceed them. You could rise up out of 2020 and into a whole new exciting life of accomplishment.

ACTION STEP

If you're ready to take on your resolutions with greater success; if all this sounds like something you might be interested in, CLICK HERE for more details on how to get started.

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Are Hospitals Overwhelmed?

Sat, 12 Dec 2020 14:00:02 GMT

Overwhelmed hospitals give you a clue into an important metric

According to a report from NPR on December 9, 2020, the federal government on Monday released detailed hospital-level data showing the toll COVID-19 is taking on health care facilities, including how many inpatient and ICU beds are available on a weekly basis.

Just how overwhelmed are the hospitals across America?

Below is a snapshot of an interactive map showing where hospitals are filling up.

The NPR report goes on to say that the focus is on one important metric — how many beds are filled with COVID-19 patients. " The ratio of COVID-19 hospitalizations to total beds gives a picture of how much strain a hospital is under. Though there's not a clear threshold, it's concerning when that rate rises above 10% .." ( source )

Here's the point:

When a hospital is overwhelmed, it reaches a critical point where the number of available beds is not enough to supply the demand of sickness that is, or could be, present. The key is "could be".

According to a report from Web MD, hospitals are coping with overwhelm by taking steps:

Postponing non-emergency care
Adjusting staffing
Partnering with other hospitals
Stocking up on equipment and supplies

We're talking about margin, folks. That's the key metric for measuring how overwhelmed a hospital is.

And the same holds true for you. How much margin is there in your life right now? Spiritually, Relationally, Financially, Emotionally, Physically, Vocationally?

Just like hospitals, you must keep your eye fixed on the key metrics of supply and demand.

An excellent person keeps a constant eye on the demand that needs to not only meet the current demands, but the potential demands as well. That's margin.

ACTION STEP

Pick one of the areas I listed above (Spiritual, Relational, Financial, Emotional, Physical, Vocational)
Identify what margin looks like
Assess how much you have right now
List steps to take to avoid overwhelm

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Humility Required

Fri, 11 Dec 2020 14:19:26 GMT

Humbling yourself to excellence

When you think of the word humility, you likely have visions of an embarrassing moment in your life or the life of someone else. You might think of someone getting cut down to size, or a person that is shy or has a mild temperament. None of these versions of humility is what we’re going to discuss when it comes to excellence.

Discovering your ZOE (zone of excellence) will however require you to practice humility. How will you go about this? There are various ways, but it all boils down to your capacity to constantly learn from everyone and everything. That sounds rather daunting doesn’t it? Fortunately, there are small steps that you can take toward humility. The first step is to listen to and work through constructive criticism.

In an article by Fast Company , Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic shares some strategies for utilizing constructive criticism in a healthy way. The key point from the article is that it is an ongoing process which requires experiencing criticism in a space where you feel safe and trust the individual offering the criticism. The article also speaks to revisiting this space for continual evaluation to maintain a standard of growth.

While it’s helpful to have another person evaluate your growth and offer insights, it’s also important to evaluate your own growth in humility.

Are you learning from the people with whom you interact?

How do you respond to difficult conversations and stressful situations?

Have you learned from a previous mistake and put your knowledge to practice recently?

These are all practical ways to study humility and apply it towards your journey of excellence.

ACTION STEP:

Schedule lunch with a friend or colleague that you know will offer constructive criticism
Be sure to ask the tough questions to gain useful feedback
Reflect on a time when you avoided humility in a situation and evaluate how you could have humbled yourself instead.

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An Excellent Vision Statement

Thu, 10 Dec 2020 15:35:19 GMT

Does your vision statement have a relational tone?

If you want to build a vision statement for your organization, you need to wrestle with one fundamental decision: Is the vision statement for your organization transactional or relational?

Without being aware of it, you can lead your organization into a transactional-centric culture where everything is about raising funds, meeting your budget, finding donors, and seeking volunteers. If you're reading this and you lead a for-profit organization, the same holds true. It's understandable. The organization needs these things in order to remain sustainably reliable. But there's more to it when it comes to the vision statement. Let's talk about the difference between transactional and relational vision statements.

A Vision Statement Of A Transactional Connection To The Market

A transaction is the exchange of goods or services for money. There is an equality association. If you give me X I will give you Y and as long as we both feel there is fairness, we leave happy. Transactional vision statements largely have numbers in the sentences. You'll see phrases like, "10,000 meals served" or "500 volunteers" or "15% growth year over year."

The problem with transactional vision statements is that they can quickly erode and become impersonal. You don't want an impersonal connection with those you serve.

A Vision Statement Of A Relational Connection With The Market

By contrast, a relationship (an excellent one) is an ambiguous dance of the exchange of ideas. There is give and take. Both parties seek to build up the other with nothing expected in return. Each party feels they gain more from the other. Relational vision statements largely have quality of life in the statements. You'll see phrases like, "10% reduction in poverty", or "greater inspiration in the community" or "a great customer experience".

The market is crying out for organizations with a relational vision statement. There is a rising movement for more authenticity in marketing and in leadership. The pandemic of 2020 has magnified and accelerated this movement like nothing else prior. The benefit of relational vision statements is that they enhance and grow over time. You want a growing relational connection with those you serve.

The Importance Of Prepositions In Your Vision Statement

Notice the prepositions after the word "Connection" in both statements.

After the Transaction Connection is "TO". We do transactions to our market for profit or for sustainability.

After the Relational Connection is "WITH". We do relationship with our market.

Before I conclude, I want to acknowledge the need for numbers and metrics and KPI's. Without them, we foolishly lead. But perhaps they should be reserved for the Mission Statement.

ACTION STEP

Get out your vision statement and see how much it reflects a transactional tone compared to a relational tone.

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The Goal Achievement Cycle

Wed, 09 Dec 2020 18:00:09 GMT

How to achieve your goals using a cycle with four steps

So you have a goal you want to achieve, huh? But you've tried this before and failed. You've used mobile apps, you've tried sheer grit and determination. But you haven't really enjoyed the euphoria of goal achievement.

If you're looking for genuine goal achievement, you've come to the right place.

No idea makes any difference without execution. No ambition, no thought, no intention - absolutely nothing becomes reality until there is execution. It all comes down to the walk. You can bank on that!

I want you to

achieve your goals

Let's go!

4 Steps In The Cycle Of Goal Achievement

The first step in achieving your goals is to CLARIFY the outcome.

If you don’t know where you’re going, pretty much any route will get you there. If you want a certain outcome, you must identify it, name it, picture it. Ask yourself these questions:

What will I look like?
What will I have that you don’t have right now?
What will I be able to do that you aren’t able to do right now?
What will I no longer have to put up with or tolerate?
What will improve in my life?
What will be gone from my life?
How will my life be better?

The second step in achieving your goals is to IDENTIFY everything that needs to happen for success.

Be brutally honest with yourself. Many people skimp on this step and ultimately take a lot longer to achieve their goal or worse, give up altogether. So ask yourself these questions: For me to reach this goal…

What will I have to start doing?
What will I have to stop doing?
What will I have to change? And how?
What steps are involved?

The third step in achieving your goals is to EXECUTE the key actions that will yield the greatest movement toward your goal.

A 90-day period contains 13 weeks. Go for 12 weeks executing the key actions that will get you to your desired goal.

Take the 13th week to do a review of where you stand. Ask yourself these questions:

Did I do everything I committed to doing the past 12 weeks?
How do I feel (gut feeling) about my progress?
What did I learn about myself and my goals?
How did my progress for the past 12 weeks move me closer to the kind of person I want to become?

The fourth step in achieving your goals is to REVIEW your progress and amend as necessary.

Take what you answered in STEP 3 above and compare it with the picture you painted in STEP 1

What do I need to amend?
What needs to stay the same (what did I confirm about my goal)?
What needs to be added to my goals?

______________

ACTION STEP

Research has shown that when pursuing a goal, if you have someone with whom you are checking in regularly on your progress toward your goal, you increase your probability of success in achieving that goal by 95%.

Ninety-Five Percent!

But what if, in addition to weekly check-ins, you had an informal board of advisors made of others who were also pursuing their own goals? You can. It's called The 95 Club

To get the details of how you can increase your probability of success by 95% for as little as $0.55/day,

CLICK HERE

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3 Steps To Regain Control

Tue, 08 Dec 2020 12:40:14 GMT

The sense of control releases the mind to a world of creativity

Your mind was created for creativity. There are ideas, possibilities, concepts and brilliant connections just waiting to be unleashed. The problem is, you don't feel in control of your circumstances. Now, before I go any further, let me clarify what I mean by control.

For the purpose of this post, I'm not referring to direct control you have, say, over your response to certain things that happen to you. It's true, you cannot always control circumstances, but you can control your response to them. However, the purpose of this post has more to do with the sense of control. It's more the emotion or feeling you have.

The Locus Of Control

Locus, or location, of control can either be outside of you or inside of you. When it is outside of you, your creativity is consumed by the fear that something is going to surprise you and negatively impact your life. Because this fear is a real emotion, it takes up residence in your brain - the part that signals your fight or flight tendency. As long as the locus of control is outside of you, there is little time for creative reflection.

When the locus of control resides inside of you, that's a different story altogether. It's a wonderful thing to sense that no matter what happens, you know who you are and Whose you are. You are confident in your own skin, you know your design, and you know there is hope.

But how do you get the locus of control inside you when it's currently outside?

I propose a 3-step process that helps you grab ahold of the thoughts and ideas swirling around in your head, keeping the locus of control outside of you and reign them in so you can take control.

The 3D Process

DOWNLOAD . The first thing you need to do is identify the scope of what's in your mind. Sit down with a piece of paper or outlining program on your computer. Start writing down everything that's flying around in your mind. Don't worry about grammar, spelling or repeating thoughts. Get it all down and out of your mind. This will give you an immediate sense of control because you are now looking down on everything, rather than trying to herd cats.

DIVIDE . Downloading is just the beginning. What you've done so far is moving a random mess of thoughts from your head to paper (or screen). Now it's time to put them into a framework which will set up the 3rd step - Disseminate. Put each thought into one of six buckets:

SPIRITUAL
RELATIONAL
FINANCIAL
EMOTIONAL
PHYSICAL
VOCATIONAL

DISSEMINATE . Each thought is now ready to be evaluated with regard to execution. The thoughts will fall into one of the following stages:

TRASH - These are thoughts that have no future in your life. They were just passing ideas that have no bearing on where you are headed.
PARK - These are thoughts that have merit but it's not yet time to act on them. These are also thoughts that need to marinate a while before you decide whether they are trash or act worthy.
ACT - These are thoughts that, if acted on right now, would make an enormous impact on the progress you need to make.

I've written more on the 3D Process HERE

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Open Mind Open Doors

Mon, 07 Dec 2020 16:57:56 GMT

Opposition makes room for growth

Mindset is tremendously important in relation to your Journey of Excellence. Have a closed mindset and you may never move forward. Have an open mind and your journey may go unhindered. Take a moment to consider whether your mind is open or closed when it comes to excellence.

A closed mind is like a closed door, not only can it negatively impact your journey, but it may also set you in a backwards trajectory. That is why you must evaluate your mindset as you pursue excellence. Open your mind to an opposing worldview to your own. This may sound counter productive at first but consider the current social dilemma.

The Social Dilemma tells us that when we engage in free online services like Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, WE are the product. This means that every like and comment, as well as the amount of time we spend on pages, influences what we see in our newsfeeds. That mindset reinforces what we already want to see, which further entrenches us in our biases and prejudices. We need to break out of this cycle and suspend judgment. We need to see things from others' points of view.

Consider this: if you are consistently surrounded by like-mindedness, with no opposing views, you may begin to believe that your view is the only view or by default, the correct view. Without opposition to challenge your perspective, you may never understand why you think, act, and believe a certain way. It also means that your defense of your worldview will be non-existent due to its never being tested. By not exploring oppositional beliefs you may hinder your own journey of excellence when you hit the wall of a challenging belief. In the journey of excellence, open mindedness doesn’t mean accepting every opposing view, but it does mean being exposed to different views than your own.

Action Steps

Schedule lunch with a detractor . Listen to their point of view and mindfully share your own position. Bonus points if this is someone that you already know and can safely share your beliefs with them.
Read material from an author with whom you disagree . This could be a book, a news source, a blog post, or another form of content that challenges your worldview and helps you to see another perspective.
Suspend judgment . It’s easy to judge the opposition based on the idea that our view is the only right one. However, if you search for truth in what another person is saying without first judging their thoughts, you may find common ground.
Keep an open mind . Your perspective may grow and change as you pursue your journey of excellence. By keeping an open mind, you allow excellence to develop smoothly and organically rather than fighting your way through the process.

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An Excellent Succession

Sun, 06 Dec 2020 13:51:49 GMT

It's Monday and the funeral is over. What will your organization do?

So you're the head of an organization. You have several people working with you and you turn a profit most months in the year. Your organization is providing a product/service that is being used by clients and you are humming right along.

What if you were suddenly taken out of the equation? What if there was instantly no more influence you could provide? What would happen to the people who work for you? What would happen to the profits? Where would your clients go?

EXIT SUCCESSION

If you haven't thought about it before, you will definitely want to now. What is the plan for your departure from the position you hold?

It's not intuitive when you're feeling good and the business is running well. But it needs to be a consideration if you're going to have an excellent organization that isn't teetering on the absence of a plan.

TWO PARTS OF SUCCESSION

There are two elements of succession you may want to consider:

Who will do your duties?

This requires that you make a list of everything you are currently doing. Then, analyze them as to whether they are tasks you need to be doing anyway. If not, offload them as soon as possible. This will leave you with the few, but atomic, tasks that must be done that only you can do.

With that list, begin looking for the person (inside or outside your organization) who has the greatest probability of success doing these tasks. Then start having conversations with them.

How will the organization pay for your replacement?

Your succession could be a quick and unexpected exit. God forbid, you get hit by a bus or have a heart attack. In those cases, how will your organization be able to weather the season after the funeral and everyone has gone home? Without money, this could greatly impact the success of the organization.

Key person life insurance is a great way to cover the costs of uncertainty by your staff and market as well as funding a head hunter to help find your replacement.

These are just a couple elements of an excellent succession. Can you think of others?

ACTION STEP

Do an inventory of your succession plan.
What do you have in place that needs to be updated?
What do you need to add that isn't in place yet?

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Pivot

Sun, 06 Dec 2020 02:42:23 GMT

Your organization's stability or vulnerability is all up to you.

"Everything rises or falls on leadership."

Ever heard that? Here's another: " You lead by what you cause and what you allow. Therefore, you are ridiculously in charge ." That one is attributed to Dr. Henry Cloud.

Here's one more: " Influence is inevitable. Leadership never stops ."

If you're the head of an organization, I'd like to share two types of the key position you hold. But first, I want you to imagine your organization is a cone, like a sugar cone that holds ice cream. Big at the top and reduces to a point at the bottom. It's the bottom I'd like to address.

Let's say you are the bottom of the cone, your organization. The next in command on your staff are a stop above you. The managers are above them. And up it goes. It's an upside-down organizational chart. It's a servant leadership framework. As one works down in the organization (not up), they assume more weight and responsibility. The success of every position is measured by how successful (or not) those above them are.

This leads us to you, the main leader. The buck stops with you. You are the tip (or the very bottom in my example) of the organization. This position is the Pivot. Everything pivots on your leadership. That's why I started with the quotes above.

TWO TYPES OF PIVOTS

There are 2 types of pivots: A pivot point and a pivot base. Let's look at each one.

THE PIVOT POINT is the leader who has no exit strategy. There is no succession plan. No key person life insurance policy naming the organization as the beneficiary in the event of his/her unexpected demise. The Pivot Point is not healthy, doesn't take care of himself, and has no healthy rhythm. There is no board advising him. There are no coaching relationships nor continuing education.

When an organization is led by a Pivot Point, it is vulnerable. The entire organiation teeters on the point like a top. The only way to compensate for a Pivot Point is to run very fast and very well, which is not always possible, not matter how well the organization is run. Eventually, the organization will topple.

THE PIVOT BASE is quite different. There is an exit strategy. There is a succession plan. There is key person life insurance with the organization named as beneficiary. The Pivot Base is healthy, takes care of herself and maintains a healthy rhythm. There is a board of advisors speaking wisdom to her. The Pivot Base has an appreciation for personal development and surrounds herself with advisors, coaches, and consultants.

When an organization is led by a Pivot Base, it is stable. The entire organization spins and grows and expands. As the Pivot Base gets wider with more advise and growth, the top of the organization grows. This generates a spin and centrifugal force that allows the organization to spin off other initiatives with the increased profit.

CONCLUSION

What kind of Pivot are you for your organization? How deeply to you see how you are either contributing to your organization's strength or its vulnerability?

ACTION STEP

Consider the characteristics of the Pivot Base listed above.
For any that aren't present in your life, commit to make them a new commitment. Your organization is depending on you.

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Power Of Vision

Fri, 04 Dec 2020 14:46:56 GMT

The valley of despair requires a strength most people don't build.

The key to sustained growth and development in becoming the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design is a compelling vision. In this post, it's my aim to show you what a vision is, how important a vision is, and how you can craft your very own vision.

WHAT IS A PERSONAL VISION?

Vision, according to The Highlands Company is defined as, " Your personal vision [of] how you commit to living your life. It influences all areas including family, spirituality, physical well-being, leisure, and work. A clear personal vision is an integration of your abilities, interests, personality, values, goals, skills/experience, family of origin, and stage of adult development. "

That's a pretty good definition to start with. So, how will you commit to living your life? What kind of person do you aspire to be? As you probably concluded already, this is not the sort of thing you can simply sit down and hammer out over one cup of coffee. But run through those questions once more, slowly:

How will you commit to living your life?

What kind of person do you aspire to be?

James Clear , in his book Atomic Habits, speaks of a woman who lost 100 pounds simply by asking one question, " What would a healthy person do? " She determined she was going to be a healthy person (see question #2 above) and she set out to prove it to herself at every opportunity.

When standing at the elevator and set of stairs, she asked herself, " What would a healthy person do? " and took the stairs. When looking at a menu with either a juicy hamburger or a big salad, she asked herself, "What would a healthy person do?" and ordered the salad.

You see, a personal vision is the person you decide you're going to be and then you can set out to prove it to yourself.

WHY IS VISION SO IMPORTANT?

When we get inspired to change, we are filled with Uninformed Optimism . " How great it's going to be when I achieve the goal of ___ ! " you say to yourself. You're inspired, invigorated, and optimistic.

But then you begin to notice the sacrifice required to achieve the goal. It's not going to be easy. Congratulations! You just reached Informed Pessimism . This is when you face the reality of the journey you're on and it's not going easy. So you have negative emotions. But wait, it gets worse.

If you've stuck it out through Informed Pessimism, you are assuming the sacrifices. You're doing what you need to do. It's not easy but you're doing it. Yet, you're still not seeing any results. Boom! You're in the stage called the " Valley of Despair ." (No wonder so many people dislike change).

It's when you're in the Valley that a compelling vision does its most important work. Without a vision, you join the throngs of people who set out with great enthusiasm to tackle some life change and eventually go back to the way things were.

But not you! No, you are working with a powerful tool: Your compelling vision. Your vision will be the partner you need when you're traveling through the Valley of Despair until you reach the next phase, Informed Optimism .

Informed Optimism is a great phase. It means you are starting to see some results from your efforts. You start to think, " Hey, maybe I CAN be the kind of person I want to be!" It's so invigorating to be at this stage. You're proving it. You can do it!

But you cannot reach that phase without a compelling vision. That's why vision is so important.

HOW TO CREATE A PERSONAL VISION (ACTION STEP)

Step One:

Make a list of words that resonate with you. Start by going to a site that has a list of descriptive words. Here's one such page: https://www.enchantedlearning.com/wordlist/adjectivesforpeople.shtml

Pick out all the words from the list that contain some value to you. They jump off the screen at you. This will help get your creative juices flowing.

Step Two:

Group your list of words by affinity. For example, all the words that deal with spirituality go together, put all the financial words together, etc.

Step Three:

Start with a 15-sentence statement of vision. Don't worry about grammar or perfection. Just write 15 sentences based on the words you've grouped together. Then pare down the 15 sentences to the most important 10 sentences. Then reduce it to 5 sentences. Then 1 sentence.

By now you will have a long statement (15 sentences), an executive summary (5 sentences), and an elevator pitch (1 sentence).

Don't be fooled by the simplicity. Yes, it's simple. But that doesn't mean easy. It will take time. You will struggle until you are happy with the result. You may also want to bound your Step Three by a few close relationships to see what they think.

CONCLUSION

So I trust you now know enough to begin crafting your own personal compelling vision. It will be needed as you enter the new year. In fact, over the holiday season is a great time to do the exercise because we all tend to be more reflective as the current year ends and the new year comes into view.

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Swinging

Thu, 03 Dec 2020 01:19:56 GMT

Knowing and doing are two different things

You may know what's best for you. But heeding it is another thing altogether. Take sleep for instance. My wife and I recently babysat our granddaughter, Jolie. After we put her down to sleep she rolled around and played with the railings on the crib, snuggled with her blanket... pretty much anything to stay awake. Watch this short video.

Jolie is too young to understand the importance of sleep. But you and I know how vital it is to staying in our Zone Of Excellence . Yet, how often do you stay up late, or work too many days in a row without a day off?

We all need what I call Swing. It's the rhythm of a pendulum. On one end is complete rest. On the other end is complete energetic output. The problem arises when we don't swing right.

There are two possible ways to have improper swing. The first is too much rest. My guess is, this is not a problem for you. The other is too much output. Now that's where we have the most problem.

You must come to grips with the fact that more and more output diminishes over time when there is no rest. The paradoxical thing is this:

More is less.

An excellent life requires that you both understand and practice this key life concept:

Stop resting from your work

Start working from your rest

As long as rest is last, it will always less than you need. But when rest is first, it becomes an investment in future output.

ACTION STEP

Starting tonight, view the beginning of your day as the moment your head hits the pillow. Rest first, then work.

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Emotionally Intelligent Business

Tue, 01 Dec 2020 12:21:08 GMT

It all comes down to your people.

Why Emotional Intelligence?

Organizations that are excellent have emotionally intelligent leaders and more engaged and satisfied employees. Hiring emotionally intelligent leaders improves your organization’s employment brand, talent retention and productivity. Emotional intelligence makes your organization stronger.

Your workplace is a collection of different people who come together to work toward a common goal. In order to achieve lasting success, everyone must get along and support each other. But life is a roller coaster and humans are emotional creatures. It’s natural to feel happy, sad, excited, or angry from day to day. The key is to understand those emotions and express them in a healthy way that is received well by others. Emotionally intelligent people can maintain an even-keel, keeping their feelings in check so they don’t throw off the flow of the workplace.

Excellent companies prevent employee conflicts by hiring emotionally intelligent people and develop an emotionally intelligent workforce.

Non-excellent companies that make lots of money without EI in their organizations produce what is considered “negative profit” because of the toll the profitable environment takes on the human spirit. Over time, it’s not sustainable. Eventually leadership will burn out and employees will destroy one another.

What is Emotional Intelligence?

Basically, an emotionally intelligent person possesses four main traits. Self-Awareness, Self-Management, Social Awareness, Relational Management.

Self-Awareness. This trait is the very core of EI. The self-aware person understands their strengths, weaknesses, motivations and how others perceive them. They are confident in who they are both emotionally and physically.

Self-Management. The EI person can manage his internal states, impulses, and resources. They effectively control their emotional, taking initiative to act on opportunities, and adapt to changes. They maintain a positive attitude and strive to exceed or improve expectations.

Social Awareness. With social awareness, an EI person is aware of others’ feelings, needs and concerns. Empathy is a critical component because it allows us to understand and care about other’s feelings and perspectives. The EI person has a grasp of the group’s emotional currents and power relationships. They can anticipate, recognize, and meet other’s needs.

Relational Management. The EI person successfully manages relationships by inspiring, guiding, influencing and developing others. They initiate or manage change whenever necessary and negotiate or resolve disagreements to maintain respect and synergy.

Other Common Traits of the Emotionally Intelligent Person

Team player – They work for the greater good of their team and company. They appreciate being embraced but don’t need it. They trust their hard work is recognized.
Positive and down to earth – They take common work issues in stride instead of being easily rattled. But they don’t wear rose-colored glasses and ignore an issue or diminish its impact.
Focused – No matter what’s going on in their life, they’re able to leave it at the door when they come to work and focus on the job at hand.
Accountable – They don’t make excuses or blame others when mistakes happen. They own up to the problem and learn from the experience.
Confident – They’re not afraid of failure or embarrassment. They don’t let fear prevent them from testing new ideas and asking questions.
Ego free – Confidence is good but over-confidence rubs others the wrong way. It’s a fine line but emotionally intelligent people know how to walk it

How to identify Emotional Intelligence (interviewing)

First, What NOT To Do

Do NOT use personality tests as a proxy for EI. Most of these tests attempt to measure what they say they do: personality. They do not measure specific competencies of emotional intelligence such as self-awareness, positive outlook, achievement orientation, empathy, or inspirational leadership.
Do NOT use a self-report test. There are two reasons these don’t work. First, if a person is not self-aware, how can he possibly assess his own emotional intelligence? And if he is self-aware, and knows what he’s missing, is he really going to tell the truth when trying to get a job?
Do NOT use a 360-degree feedback instrument, even if it is valid and even if it measures EI competencies, like the Emotional and Social Competency Inventory (ESCI) does. A tool like 360-degree feedback ought to be used for development, not evaluation. When these instruments are used to evaluate, people game them by carefully selecting the respondents, and even prepping them on how to score.

Now, What To DO

Get references and talk to them. Letters of reference simply aren’t good enough when it comes to understanding your candidate’s EI. When you talk with a reference, you can ask specific and pointed questions about how the candidate demonstrated various EI competencies. Get lots of examples, with lots of detail. Specifically, ask for examples of how your candidate treats other people.
Interview for emotional intelligence. This sounds easy and many people think they are already interviewing for EI but we aren’t, much of the time. That’s because we allow people to be vague in their responses and fail to ask good follow-up questions. Even when we ask candidates directly about EI or EI-related competencies, they talk about an idealized notion of themselves and what they’d like to be, rather than how they really behave. To overcome this obstacle, you can use behavioral event interviewing .
Start the interview by making the candidate as comfortable as possible. The goal here is to make the interview feel conversational, informal, and warm. This tone will help to ensure that you get the truth. Then, ask a couple of traditional questions about the person’s background and experience. Now you’re ready to start the behavioral event portion of the interview:

Looking for Self-Awareness
What are your top three strengths?
What are your top three weaknesses?
How would your friends describe you?
What are your short-term and long-term goals?

If they struggle to answer any of these questions, or if they seem unsure of themselves throughout the interview, the candidate is likely not self-aware. If they answer quickly and confidently, they could be emotionally intelligent.

Looking for Self-Management
Can you tell me about a time when you felt that a manager or co-worker wronged you, and what you did about it?
Can you give me an example of a time when you disagreed with a co-worker’s idea or decision, and what you did about it?
Can you tell me about a time when you took initiative at work?

Learning how your candidates handle emotionally challenging situations in the workplace will provide insight into how they manage their emotions. Also pay attention to the candidate’s body language and word choice as they answer your questions. If they seem relaxed and focused, they are likely great self-managers.

Looking for Social Awareness
How would you deal with an upset co-worker or customer?
How can you tell whether your co-workers and customers feel supported?
What are some ways to determine whether your co-workers are happy and engaged at work?

If the candidate’s responses relate to being empathetic, carefully listening, and seeing the situation from the other person’s perspective, you are likely looking at an emotionally intelligent candidate. Watching how they interact with other people, as well as evaluating how attentive they are, can help you determine their level of social awareness

Looking for Relational Management
Can you give me an example of when you helped a team member in the past?
Can you tell me about a time when you proposed a new process at work?
Can you explain a time when you settled a disagreement in the workplace?

By asking more questions like these and weighing the answers more heavily, you can increase your chances of finding an emotionally intelligent leader.

How to Grow Emotional Intelligence in Your Organization

Make it part of your hiring process. Some companies have a “No Jerks Policy” or ask hiring team members to consider if they would hang out with a candidate outside the office. Exercises like these ensures a new hire gels with their team, above all else.

Include it in your job descriptions. Define the personality traits you need your new hire to have. But go beyond short, cliché phrases like “team player” and “works well under pressure.” Create a complete personality profile and make it known you’re seeking that type of person.

Sources

How to Hire Emotionally Intelligent Leaders

http://www.recruiting.com/blog/how-to-hire-emotionally-intelligent-leaders

Emotional Intelligence: The Most Overlooked Candidate Skill

http://recruiterbox.com/blog/emotional-intelligence-overlooked-candidate-skill/

How to Hire for Emotional Intelligence

https://hbr.org/2016/02/how-to-hire-for-emotional-intelligence

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An Excellent Business

Mon, 30 Nov 2020 16:10:06 GMT

Challenging Status Quo

Your business may not be excellent. Here are some of the reasons why...

BOTTOM UP, NOT TOP DOWN

You've probably seen a typical org chart. The CEO is the top box, then under that are the various VP positions. Below that are the department managers, and so on. The business of excellence turns the typical org chart on its head. The CEO is the bottom box and upward the org chart goes.

In an excellent business therefore, an aspiring employee would want to work down in the company, not up. As you progress down, you carry more weight. This means more responsibility for success. Speaking of success, your measurement of success is dependent on the success all the ones above you. The more above you, the more weight. The more weight, the more responsibility.

THE PIVOT POINT

At the bottom of the excellence business is "The Pivot". This is the individual who is the main source of leadership and responsibility. Typically, it will be the CEO or business owner. There are two types of Pivots: The Pivot Point and the Pivot Base. When the CEO is a Pivot Point, the entire organization is vulnerable. Just like the point of an upside-down cone. A Pivot Point is when the CEO is unhealthy, has no exit strategy, has no key person life insurance.

When the CEO is a Pivot Point, the entire organization has a firm foundation on which to grow and expand. A Pivot Base is when the CEO is healthy, has an exit strategy, has key person life insurance, etc.

THE CORE

The core of an excellent business is not what you may typically think. It's not profits, although those are extremely important. It's not the people in the organization, as some may want you to believe. So what is the core? It's the market. It's the end user of whatever product or service you produce. If you are not a team that surrounds your market, everything else will eventually fall apart.

There's so much more to cover with the business of excellence. But for now, if you own a business and you want to delve deeper with me into how your business can be excellent, search the blog with the phrase "Part 4"

ACTION STEP

Grab a cup of coffee and reflect a little while on these questions:
Is my company a top down or bottom up?
Am I a pivot point or a pivot base?
Is my business or my market the core of all we do?

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The Whirlwind of Excellence

Mon, 30 Nov 2020 00:25:38 GMT

When progress is slowed

We don't progress through the journey of excellence in a vacuum. There is an arena where the journey of excellence unfolds. Think about this arena as a whirlwind. The whirlwind is everything life throws at you good or bad, easy or hard, necessary or unnecessary, exciting or depressing. It’s all part of what happens as we progress through our excellence journey.

Some events in the whirlwind have the potential to either slow us down or knock us back to a previous stage. This doesn’t mean that all events are negative, but even good events can bring us to a standstill.

Imagine this, you give birth to a child. Your newfound parenthood requires you to be occupied most of the day and keeps you up at night. Due to a lack of time, attention, and focus, some things in your journey of excellence will simply have to wait (i.e. you've been slowed down). After an adjusting to your new role as a parent, you can recalibrate and once again begin to make progress in your journey of excellence.

Another scenario could be the sudden death of a loved one. This may impact you so deeply that, no matter how good things are going, the wind is knocked out of your sails and you get stuck in the event, put off the progress you're making and slip back to stages previously achieved. This regression likely is not permanent, but it takes time and effort to move forward towards excellence.

Bruce A. Miller (Your Life in Rhythm) shares, the key is to understand life stages and life seasons and not look at the journey of excellence in terms of life balance (the expectation to keep all things going well in every area equally) but in terms of life rhythm (appropriate response to the ebbs and flows of life seasons and stages).

Keep in mind that the seasons and stages of life that Bruce is referring to are different things. A Season includes things like: illness, the birth of a child, adopting a new pet, a business startup, etc. However, a stage would be categorized as: childhood, adolescence, adulthood, mid-life, seasoned age, and end of life. Bruce’s thoughts are important because how you handle the whirlwind of excellence will look different depending on the intersection of your stage and your season of life (your experience level and circumstances).

Action Step

Think about a time when a new season of life slowed down your journey of excellence. Would you consider that season to be positive or negative?
Consider how your stage of life impacted your view of the season you faced.
Read an overview of Bruce A Millers book here: https://voice.dts.edu/review/bruce-miller-your-life-in-rhythm/ or take the time to read his book in its entirety.

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Openness

Sat, 28 Nov 2020 16:55:03 GMT

Gold awaits for those who have the capacity

The road to excellence is paved with opportunity. Unfortunately, many people aren't able to see the opportunity that exists right before their eyes. Are you one of those people? Look at what you might be missing:

That smile you gave that person who didn't reciprocate with a smile back at you... not everyone is happy all the time. What could that person's story be?
You got angry as soon as your dog barked. Are you under a little more stress than you care to admit?
Your 1-year-old granddaughter started putting a couple words together. When was the last time you tried something you've never done before?
.... and on it goes

Every Day = Hundreds Of Opportunities For Insight

Let's say you captured just 3 new pieces of new knowledge/insight every day for a year. Let's say you captured them during a moment of reflection at the end of every day in a journal. That would be nearly 1,100 pieces of insight. Just imagine what the themes might reveal to you about yourself and your world. Imagine the data you would have to work with as you developed your expression of your unique design.

There is a skill that you must possess and hone if you are to get traction on your journey to becoming the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design. It doesn't come natural for most people. But it is for everyone. That skill is openness. Let's take a closer look at what openness is.

OPENNESS

Openness is your key to bending time to your favor. It's a skill that will help you reach your goals quicker and with greater meaning. It requires 3 character traits. I encourage you to rate yourself on a scale of 1-5 on each of these traits (1 = very low, 5 = very high).

Humility . This is the skill of giving up the control of having to have the answers all the time; to put yourself under the teaching of others, young or old.
Patience . This is the skill of putting aside your eagerness for conquest; to put yourself in a slow mode to let learning do its thing in you.
Thought . This is the skill of mental energy; to go against the grain of our technologically fragmented news stories and social media posts and give thought for a longer period of time without giving up.

ACTION STEP

Take the rating numbers you gave yourself and commit to improving on them.
Commit to a week of reflecting every evening before you go to bed by journaling 3 new insights you gained in the day. When the week is over, renew that commitment.

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The Simplicity Of Financial Excellence

Sat, 28 Nov 2020 04:26:29 GMT

You might be surprised at what you can do about debt.

The person who is serious about becoming the fullest expression of his/her unique, God-given design will be committed to financial excellence. Most people understand it as financial freedom. It's true, financial freedom is what we all want. However, this freedom is a byproduct of financial excellence, which is a much broader concept.

This post will mention two simple principles related to your pursuit of financial excellence. Below is episode 004 of the Fridays On Excellence Show . In it, I conduct an interview with Sam Couchenour, a 28-year-old who, along with his wife, have become debt-free. We addressed 2 main points:

First, Financial Excellence Is For Everyone . This is good news for you and for me. Financial excellence is a doable goal for everyone. Second, Every Dollar Has A Name . This means there is work to be done and it's simple (not easy, but simple).

ACTION STEP

Take stock of all debt you currently have.
Select the smallest amount you owe and begin paying it off.

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What Are You Thankful For?

Thu, 26 Nov 2020 17:07:27 GMT

Gratitude is a hallmark sign.

As I type this, it is the Thanksgiving Day holiday where I live. I have a lot for which to be thankful. As I have been reflecting on that all morning. I felt compelled to write this blog post today.

I believe one of the Hallmarks of a person who is becoming the fullest expression of their unique God-given design is gratefulness. Gratitude is something that gives you energy. With this energy, you are able to express more fully who you are in a way that aligns with your design.

So what are you thankful for today? Who are the people in your life that have lifted your spirits and encouraged you to be your own person? On the flip side, what are the challenging seasons that have brought out the best in you even though they were difficult at the time?

There are so many things and people and experiences to be thankful for today. My prayer is that you are able to reflect, regardless of what you are facing today, on the things for which to be grateful. It will do you wonders.

ACTION STEP

List five people who has spoken into your life and for that, you are a better person.
Send each of them a quick text oh thanks.

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The Impact of Change

Wed, 25 Nov 2020 12:00:02 GMT

Your journey of excellence affects others

Change never takes place in a vacuum. As you move through the checkpoints of excellence, you will find that your growth will begin to impact your relationships. This impact may be negative in some instances yet positive in others.

If you've not lived in your zone until now, you may act and look different to those who know you well. This may create a range of dissonance in your relationships. Some people won't like the fact that you are changing and may feel pressured to change their own lives, or that it threatens their existence. As the saying goes: "it's not that we don't like change. we don't like BEING changed." Your growth means they will have to adapt the way they interact with you. Your journey of excellence may even take you in a different direction than those you've been traveling with.

Your growth will be questioned by some. They may ask why there was a need for change. When you feel the desire to push away from them keep in mind that they are your greatest assets, especially in the early stages of your journey. You may become discouraged by these interactions, but it's important to look for the grains of truth in what they are saying. They may actually be the voice of reason. Sift through their words, though you may need to disregard most of them to pull out the diamonds in the soil.

Others in your life may see the benefit of your growth which could also challenge them in their pursuit of excellence. These connections are invaluable and create an environment where you continue to grow and push each other along the journey. Psalm 27:17 speaks to this type of relationship when it says, "as iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another". The relationships that remain in this category are pivotal in your journey of excellence.

Action Step

Evaluate your relationships over the course of your journey of excellence. In which category do those relationships fall? Have they changed over time?
Take notice of how your own growth/change impacted those around you.
Search for grains of truth in conversations with those who question your growth.
Find the "cheerleaders" in your life and invest in encouraging each other in your pursuit of excellence.

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Why Would I Want A Life Of Excellence?

Tue, 24 Nov 2020 13:30:52 GMT

Marathons, cheerleaders and silence.

I ran the Pittsburgh Marathon back in my mid 30's. It was an incredible experience from the first day of training until the end of race day. One of the many insights from that experience applies to the question about pursuing a life of excellence.

During the 26.2 mile course, we were led into a variety of neighborhoods and parks. There were moments of great music as bands were positioned along the course. There were crowds cheering us on. But there were other parts where it was silent. All you could hear were the huffing and puffing from you and the fellow runners around you.

The road to excellence is like that. There will be many moments when you are encouraged by those who wish you well on your journey. And there will be times when you will have to stay faithful in the silent moments when there are no cheerleaders cheering you on. But in the end, the journey of excellence is well worth the effort it will require.

Here are two main perspectives to keep in mind along the journey:

TODAY . To the extent you are immersed in the art of excellence, your life will be more fulfilling in the here and now. Think of the times when are you frustrated, fatigued, and feeling controlled by circumstances. In most cases, these are symptoms of not operating in your Zone Of Excellence . But the more you dive into the rhythm of excellence, the more fulfilling your life will be - in the present moments.

TOMORROW . To the extent that you accumulate excellence, the amount of regrets you will face will be less. Your excellence will cause you to create elements that will far outlive you. This is what it means to live forever. In terms of legacy, your impact will be felt for many more years than you will actually be alive.

ACTION STEP

Think back to a time when you were completely and utterly fulfilled; when your heart sang
List 2-3 elements that were present which made it such a fulfilling moment
Consider those elements and how they could be showing you what kind of excellence you are designed for.

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The Thing About Over-Commitment

Mon, 23 Nov 2020 14:57:47 GMT

How many plates are you spinning?

I received an email from a good friend the other day. In it was this sentence: " Do you have any info on time-blocking techniques? I’m so over committed it’s killing me ."

First, you must know that this could just as well have been a sentence I could have sent to my coach because I know exactly how it feels. I've been there. I will probably be there again sometime in the future. It happens to all of us. So, in this post, I'd like to share my observations about over-commitment. First, what's going on. Second, what can be done.

WHAT'S GOING ON?

Every morning you are given a gift of time and energy. At the end of the day, those two are spent and cannot be recovered. Think of them as non-renewable resources. On a day-to-day basis, these are finite. Therefore, you are inherently constrained in the amount of work you can do in any one day.

Every day you face a multitude of opportunities that compete for your attention. Each requires a decision on your part. You can either say "yes" or "no". The problem is that they don't always come all at once. They come at you in small portions when they don't seem so ominous. So you say "yes", thinking what's the harm? But they accumulate. Every "yes" is a commitment. Every commitment is a chunk of the non-renewable resources of time and energy. Plus, because of the finiteness of these resources, every "yes" creates a corresponding "no" to something else. Just because you say "yes" doesn't mean the pie gets any bigger. All the other slices need to get smaller.

( I want to talk to the high-energy readers right now. If you're not high-energy, feel free to skip what I'm about to say and slide down to the next section )

Stop! That's right, stop. Stop what you're doing long enough to climb up to the cliff of the mountain so you can get a vantage point of the entire valley. You need to see what you're doing in the valley and how it is impacting your entire landscape.

There's nothing wrong with being high-energy. In fact, you are the reason the world goes around. You get things done. You make things happen. You inspire and compel great things to take place. But just like any asset, when it is taken too far it becomes a liability. Your high-energy could be a source of tremendous frustration and anxiety. It doesn't have to be that way. There is something you can do about it.

Before we move on, watch this video clip:

Charlie Callas was a comedian who displayed a humorous view of the plate-spinning routine. But it's not so funny when it's you in real life, is it?

WHAT CAN BE DONE

Get familiar with the concept of what I call "Proper Spin". Proper Spin is a habit of those who are becoming the fullest expression of their unique, God-given design. They are loving life in the present while mitigating regret in the future.

When you are properly spinning, you are aware of the following:

You know what you're mission is
You know your limits
You know your strengths
You know the consequences of "yes" and "no" (and if you don't, you take the time to discern them)

First, start with your mission. What are you trying to accomplish? If you cannot answer that, you will ride a perpetual rollercoaster of ups and downs, feeling on top of things one moment and panic of overwhelm the next. You have to know what you're trying to accomplish. When you do, you know how to frame every opportunity and which "yes" or "no" helps you accomplish that mission.

Knowing your limits is invaluable because it gives you the knowledge you need to make the best decisions in the moment. This requires a healthy dose of humility (especially for the high-energy personality). You simply cannot do it all. The sooner you acknowledge that, the better.

Knowing your strengths is invaluable as well because it lets you know your most leveraged use of time and energy. When you are operating within your Zone Of Excellence , you are at peak performance which means "little energy, massive output."

Knowing the consequences of an opportunity provides you with what you need to make a proper ROI assessment of that opportunity. You may not be able to tell the ROI in every case. For those opportunities, give yourself buffer time to make the right decision. Don't rush headlong into your "yes" or "no" until you understand the full extent of the time involved in the opportunity and the level of energy it will require of you.

So much more to say about this, but we will cover it in future blog posts.

ACTION STEP

Write out your mission.
Make a list of all your current commitments (or "plates").
In light of your mission, ask yourself these 4 key questions for each plate:
Is it a plate that must be spun?
Am I the only one who can spin it?
Am I good at spinning it?
Do I enjoy spinning it?
Keep spinning the plates that check all 4 boxes and either delegate or let the rest of the plates crash to the ground.

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The Journey Is Far From Linear

Sun, 22 Nov 2020 19:30:02 GMT

The twists and turns ARE the journey

Think of your favorite adventure movie. Now imagine how short the movie would be if the main character simply accomplished his goal with no adversity, instead he simply set out on his journey and fulfilled his purpose. The first literary example that comes to mind is the Lord of the Rings. Had Tolkien done away with the challenges that Frodo faced, there would have been no need for a trilogy of books, and it is likely that it would not be a beloved book and movie franchise today.

The journey to excellence isn’t linear. Far from it in fact. You may hit more than your fair share of roadblocks along the way, but it’s all part of your journey. Have you ever heard of an Asymptote? Think back to those Algebra classes that you forgot after high school.

“An Asymptote is a line that a curve approaches, as it heads toward infinity”. Think of this line as excellence.

Your journey to discover your unique God-given design is like the curve along the asymptote, it may turn and cross the line many times. It’s important to understand that over time the longer the line and the curve continue, the closer to zero (excellence) the curve becomes. What does this mean in non-mathematical terms? The longer you pursue excellence, the closer you will become to reaching your goal of Mature Unconscious Competence (MUC).

It may not seem like it at the time, but the obstacles that you encounter along your journey provide you with the insight to move towards a fuller understanding of your unique God-given design. Going back to Lord of the Rings, each time that Frodo faced adversity on his journey to destroy the ring, he better understood how and why he had to reach his destination. It is the same for your journey of excellence. Each hurdle you work around will over time bring you closer to excellence.

Action Step

Think back to the beginning of your journey, what obstacles have you faced in your pursuit of excellence over time?
As you establish what your goal of excellence is, have the obstacles lessened?
Consider keeping a timeline or journal to visually track your progress towards reaching your unique God-given design.
Revisit your accomplishments throughout your journey when you feel like you’re not making progress or headed away from your goal.

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It's An Active Process

Sat, 21 Nov 2020 18:50:23 GMT

There’s nothing passive about the journey to excellence

You’ve probably encountered some form of sonar over the years. Maybe you’ve use a depth finder or fish finder on your fishing trips, or maybe you’ve seen a sonar on a ship. Did you know that there are both active and passive sonar? Passive sonar involves simply “listening” for an object, however, active sonar sends signals out and also receives signals back. This offers a more accurate picture of what is coming.

Your journey towards excellence is like active sonar. It takes time and effort to locate what is around you in your pursuit of finding your unique God-given design. As you ping off an object several times you begin to see more clearly what that object is. Is it an obstacle that you need to avoid on your way to excellence, or is it something that can be utilized to assist you towards your goal?

Military Bracketing is another example of ways to assess progress. It involves firing off multiple shots to find your baseline and then having a clearer idea of where to pivot your efforts. Similarly, when used as a navigation method, sonar allows you to bypass harmful or unhelpful objects to efficiently maintain progress even when you can’t see the direction you’re headed.

The Bible speaks of how we currently see things with limited vision, but one day we will see things clearly (1 Corinthians 13:12). On your journey to excellence, you won’t see the direct path, but once you have uncovered your unique God-given design, you’ll be able to see the path toward your goal when you look back. It takes action to reach your goals. In Philippians 2:12-13 the author reminds his readers that they must keep pursuing their goals and reinforce their efforts. For you this might mean evaluating your efforts in pursuit of excellence and pivoting to better reach that goal.

ACTION STEP

Self-evaluate your journey of excellence. Are you headed in the right direction or do you need to pivot and double down your efforts?
Take a few minutes to read this article about the Journey of Desire by John Eldredge: https://delanasworld.wordpress.com/2010/12/22/journey-of-desire/
Consider reading John’s book in its entirety

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The Atomic Nature Of Excellence

Fri, 20 Nov 2020 12:43:27 GMT

What if you could bend time to your favor?

There is a concept I have used for years when describing productivity. I don't know where I picked it up, but it has served me well for a long time. It's called "ONE-TO-MANY". I like to think of it as atomic (picking the concept introduced by James Clear in his book, Atomic Habits. The idea is that if you can do a task that impacts multiple other tasks in the process, you can leverage your time and energy to get more done without burning yourself out.

Excellence is defined as

becoming the fullest expression

of your unique, God-given design.

An example is how I am doing a Friday live session every week. I go live for 20-30 minutes talking about the art of excellence. While this session is live, it is also being recorded and transcribed. This allows we the opportunity to repurpose the content as blog posts, video blog, podcast, an eventual book, and even an online course. I prep and produce the weekly live sessions and have many ways to use the content. One-To-Many.

Excellence Is Atomic

Living a life that is becoming the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design is an atomic way of life; a one-to-many way of life. That's because, when you are in your zone of excellence, you are at the peak of your use of time and energy. You can get more done in less time because it comes more naturally to you. The fulfillment in the day further fuels your progress because you feel good about what you're doing.

So are you becoming the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design today? I sure hope so. The alternative is to be working too hard with too much frustration.

ACTION STEP

List a couple activities that you are really good at doing
Consider how those activities impact your life
Think of the things you have been putting off doing that come naturally to you. Why did you stop doing them?

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Be Aware Of These 3 Blind Spots

Thu, 19 Nov 2020 14:12:53 GMT

Not all surprises are joyful.

Blind spots are not fun. They are unwanted surprises. They catch you off guard. If you’ve ever backed your car into a pole or done something similar to that, you understand the result isn’t what you expected nor what you want to have to deal with.

It’s best to remove all your blind spots.

Just because you are pursuing excellence, you are not immune to blind spots. Most will be subtle, keeping you from making progress or making the journey much more laborious than it needs to be. Some will be profound, causing you to despair, give up, and go back to your life by default.

Here are three blind spots tI want to address in this post:

Seasons . You go through seasons throughout your life. Seasons have a beginning and an end. They come to pass. In the moment, they seem extreme. It’s in these moments that you need to visit the balcony more frequently to stay on top of the bigger picture. If you don’t, you could decide to give up just before a breakthrough. Don’t let seasons blind you to your progress.

Stages . This is a more linear consideration. You are somewhere on a timeline. YOu have no doubt been through your elementary years, teenage years. You may be in your young adult life stage or older. What makes Stages a blind spot is when you assume you can do things at one stage that you used to do in a previous stage. I ran the Pittsburgh marathon in my mid-thirties. Now, in my 50’s, I doubt I could finish another marathon, let alone match my time. Don’t let stages blind you to your progress.

Life Balance . Bruce B. Miller, in his book Your Life In Rhythm, makes a strong case that the concept of life balance is bunk and is doing more harm than good. Unfortunately, the term “life balance” has become a household word and everyone recognizes it. But the danger is in assuming you can give equal energy to everything, regardless of your Seasons or Stages. You have a finite amount of time and energy in any one given day. That time and energy are subject to what you’re facing (Seasons) and where you are in your life (Stages). It’s much better to think of Life Rhythm instead. For example, if you’re sick (Season) you need to slow down and take the time to recover quicker. That means you need to change things up and not go at 100% until the season of sickness is over. That’s what Life Rhythm looks like.

ACTION STEP

Identify what life Stage you are in right now. What are you unable to do that you used to do? What are you able to do that you weren’t able to do before?

Thank back to a couple of Seasons you have faced in the past. How did it impact your ability to function?

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Slow Is Fast

Wed, 18 Nov 2020 14:53:53 GMT

Patience is much more than a virtue.

There is a simple solution using cornstarch and water that produces an amazing metaphor to describe how patience plays a key roll in your journey of excellence.

Steve Spangler provides science experiments on the Ellen Degeneres Show. He did a show where he had an enormous vat of the mixture and to illustrate its unusual properties, had a volunteer from the audience run across. Watch:

So this mixture stiffens up when you beat down fast upon it. But if you take it slow, you can sink into it easily. Hence the metaphor of excellence.

It's different than the objective in the video, where they tried not to sink. You WANT to sink into excellence because when you are immersed in your core, you come alive.

I was talking with a client the other day about this. It seems when we take the time to reflect and go slow, we are more apt to pick up on what's really going on and make necessary course corrections and get further faster. This requires patience.

Patience is so much more than a virtue. It's a vital character trait of those who are becoming the fullest expression of their unique, God-given design. Patience is both the appreciation, as well as the exercise, of the principle that slow is fast; less is more. Of course there will be times to sprint and work hard for a season. But generally, excellence is a marathon over the long run.

ACTION STEP

Pull up your Google or Outlook or Apple calendar
Create a recurring appointment first thing every morning for 15 minutes
Name it "cornstarch"
During these 15-minute appointments, reflect on all that's happening in your life. Bullet point your thoughts

How Resilient Are You?

Tue, 17 Nov 2020 11:31:33 GMT

We all face our own "Moriarty"

Navigating the journey of excellence requires resilience.

Before we address resilience, we need a common understanding of the very thing we are to be resilient against: the "whirlwind". The whirlwind is your greatest barrier to pursuing your excellence. It's like Professor Moriarty is to Sherlock Holmes. It's your nemesis, the villain of your life story.

With any great foe, it's best to divide and conquer. The whirlwind comes in four flavors: So-So, Seasons, Stages, and Surprises.

So-So events are the mundane, everyday, run of the mill events like taking the kids to school, cutting the lawn, getting groceries, going to work, building a shed in the backyard. The list goes on and on.
Seasons are periods of time when things get hectic. Examples include starting a new job, moving into a new home, the first day of kindergarten for your first child. They are temporarily frenzied.
Stages are what we go through as we age. Childhood, teenage years, young adulthood, middle adulthood, and senior adulthood. Each stage introduces a new set of challenges and limitations.
Surprises are things we don't see coming. Examples include the sudden death of a parent, an earthquake, or a pandemic. These types of whirlwind can have a short or lasting impact on us.

The key to a successful journey of excellence amid all types of whirlwind is resilience. So what is resilience?

Resilience is the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness. It is the ability of a substance or object to spring back into shape; elasticity.

Let's take the example of a skyscraper. You might think that the ability it has to stand the forces of wind is it's rigidity. Not so. It's actually it's elasticity. Without this capability of movement, a building would ironically collapse.

Some buildings use advanced wind-compensating dampers. The Citicorp Center in New York, for example, uses a tuned mass damper. In this complex system, oil hydraulic systems push a 400-ton concrete weight back and forth on one of the top floors, shifting the weight of the entire building from side to side. A sophisticated computer system carefully monitors how the wind is shifting the building and moves the weight accordingly. Some similar systems shift the building's weight based on the movement of giant pendulums. source

Because you're pursuing a life of excellence, you must recognize the impact the whirlwind has on your efforts. It's very easy to slip back into a life of mediocrity and not even know it. The whirlwind has a certain subtle quality. It's why New Year's resolutions fail right around February.

Recognizing the whirlwind's impact is part of your success. Being actively resilient is the other part. So how do you bounce back? Here are a couple suggestions:

Preset a buffer zone for anticipated whirlwind seasons. If you know you're going to have a hectic Spring next year, prepare ahead of time.
Create a "bounce back" routine. It could include 3 deep breaths, reciting a great quote or scripture you've memorized, or grabbing a cup of coffee and reflecting.

ACTION STEP

Make a list of the seasons you are likely to face over the next 3 months. How can you be preparing ahead of time for them?
Determine what stage of life you're in. Do a little research into what people in this stage typically face.
Build your own "bounce back" routine to handle the surprises.

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So You Want What God Wants, Really?

Mon, 16 Nov 2020 13:35:12 GMT

Religion may be your biggest barrier

“ The journey of excellence begins with a want. A want is a desired destination, a longing for something that I don’t currently possess, or feel that I don’t possess (I may think I don't possess it when I actually do). The dictionary states that a want is a deficiency or lack of something, or a desire for something. I believe a want is a signal telling me that there is something about my life that is not yet excellent. ” - that quote is from a blog post I wrote earlier .

Religion Is Holding You Back

I was talking with a client about this concept of wanting. His reaction was, “ I want what God wants. ” To which I said, “ Of course you do. We all do .”

But I believe that mindset is actually holding you back because you don’t really know what God wants. Oh, you know what your religion tells you. You have your traditions and your spiritual disciplines. But they can actually be holding you back. The best way for you to know this is to start with the design he’s already given you.

I understand that asking, “What do I want?” can sound selfish on the surface. After all, it’s the watchword of the “me-first” culture. But unless we start there, we will never fully become the expression of our unique, God-given design. Unless we start with our own unique design, we will ultimately live a life that religion (others) wanted us to live.

But when you start with a want, you get the car rolling. As they say, you can't steer a car unless it's moving. So here's how you include God in your personal journey of excellence.

Start pursuing a want. This is like putting your foot on the gas pedal of the moving car. But you keep your hands off the steering wheel. That's your Designer's (God's Spirit's) role - to guide you as you pursue your want. Listen for the play in the steering wheel. Play in the steering is the continuum of peace to unsettledness. When you sense peace, keep going. When you sense unsettledness, pause and reflect some more.

It's a partnership between you and The Spirit. You are going with what you understand at the moment (the gas pedal) while The Spirit is providing counsel and guidance (the steering wheel). And I would point out here how important it is to be in the Word of God and fellowship with others who are pursuing Him as well. We can be way off when we think we're right on. There is the danger of false peace.

Classification Of Wants

As you go through your process of wants, it will help to understand that there are 3 types of wants that you will uncover: Illegitimate, Representative, and Legitimate

Illegitimate wants (or “trash wants”) are culturally-instilled in you. They aren’t healthy. They are only a reflection of the loudest marketing mouths. These wants are the most deceptive. You have to separate these from the other wants because they will get you nowhere.

Representative wants (or “rocket booster wants”) are good, but they aren’t the real you. They are just representative of who you are. Think of representative wants like rocket boosters on the space shuttle. Their design is to get the astronauts into orbit and then they fall off and back into the sea. They serve their purpose and then get abandoned. For example, you may want the latest iPhone. But what you really want is a form of organizing everything. It’s not that you were designed to like technology but to be organized.

Legitimate wants (or “design wants”) are straight-up wants that tell you what your design is. If you want your child to be healthy, you are legitimately expressing the unique design of your role as a parent.

ACTION STEP

First, ask yourself, “ What do I want? ” and then journal. Write until your wrist is sore. Write everything down you can think of that you want.

Next, sift through the rubble. Look at all you’ve written and group them by affinity. What are you starting to see?

Lastly, take a deeper look at the affinity groupings. Open the hood on each grouping and consider what those wants are telling you about you.

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The Power Of Community

Sun, 15 Nov 2020 16:09:00 GMT

The power of the human connection cannot be matched

I would be no where near where I am if it weren't for the people in my life. Some have mentored me and haven't even known they were speaking into my life. Some I've been compelled to emulate. Others have provided the backdrop of who I do not wish to be.

Your journey of excellence depends on community. The power of the human connection cannot be matched. We were designed for community. We crave it, introverts and extroverts alike. The American Society of Training and Development found that people are 65 percent likely to meet a goal after committing to another person. Their chances of success increase to 95 percent when they build in ongoing meetings with their partners to check in on their progress.

Entrepreneur.com points out three styles to consider when creating an accountability network in this post :

Peer Networks - Peer-to-peer networks focused on entrepreneurs offer two-way communication that enable founders to learn from each other and share their own experiences. These groups bring together entrepreneurs with like-minded perspectives and goals. They often offer tools and resources to help further each other's ventures.

Mentors - Some entrepreneurs prefer to held accountable on a more personal level, establishing a one-on-one relationship with a person who is experienced in a particular field and has achieved a high level of success. Ninety-three percent of small and mid-sized business owners said mentoring was helpful to their success.

Applications - Some entrepreneurs work best in a competitive setting. Apps create the kind of “leaderboard” experience they’re looking for. An app makes tracking numbers and the ruthless data these entrepreneurs crave easy.

One of the hallmark elements of a person who is becoming the fullest expression of their unique, God-given design is an appreciation for the impact of community. No one can do the journey along. Being self-made is a myth, a lie. No matter the vision, resilience, or humility, you still need community.

ACTION STEP

List the 5 people closest to you (meaning, you interact with them most of the time)
Identify 2 lessons you can learn from each of these 5 people (they can be what you aspire to be or not be)
Take these 10 lessons and work them into your morning reflection times

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Checkpoints In The Journey Of Excellence

Sat, 14 Nov 2020 15:00:02 GMT

Checkpoints Along The Journey

We touched briefly on several of the checkpoints of excellence in a previous blog . Now, we’ll delve deeper into all 5 checkpoints. Each stage represents a point of consciousness in the stair step towards excellence. Some checkpoints will have more detailed subpoints as you’ll see in the details below. For illustration purposes, I have included two graphics. One is from the UKCPD Blog and it shows the stages of competence. The other is from InFocus Leadership Solutions and it covers the emotional stages of change.

N ow that we know what the checkpoints are, lets unpack them further.

01 - CHILDLIKE UNCONSCIOUS COMPETENCE (CUC) - as a child we are 100% in our element of discovery and growth. Excellence comes naturally and we aren’t yet aware of our incompetence. We aren’t afraid to try something and fail at it. We view ourselves as invincible and soak in information like a sponge. Eventually our child-like innocence is replaced by growth and a desire that we don’t understand.

02 - UNCONSCIOUS INCOMPETENCE (UI) - we want, but we do not make the connection to the fact that our want is a signal of excellence not yet expressed. For many, the search for satisfying our wants is destructive. There are temptations that lure the unconscious competent person abound such as sex, lust, drugs, alcohol, gambling, co-dependence... and the list goes on. The road of the UI is littered with broken, shattered people. This stage towards God-given purpose focuses on the unsatisfied desire. We want more and yet we don’t understand our exact desires. Essentially, we don't know what we don't know.

03 - CONSCIOUS INCOMPETENCE (CI) - we want, and we know that the want is tied somehow to our lack of excellence. Unlike UI, where we haven’t found a need to change, CI is where we begin to realize our incompetence of excellence. In the Conscious Incompetence stage, we become aware of what we want, but haven’t put together a plan to accomplish our goal of excellence. A great example of this stage would be when a person realizes that they are out of shape. The realization is there, but the steps toward changing their situation have not yet been developed.

04 (a) - PRE-CONSCIOUS COMPETENCE (PCC) - we begin the journey to articulate the random wants into a program that evolves into an ever-increasingly clear understanding of our unique God-given design and the expression of that design. We haven't reached CC yet because we must go through emotional changes (see illustration above). This stage is a large part of the active journey of excellence. We begin to develop a plan toward achieving our goals. Going back to the fitness example, this is where a person develops a plan toward getting into shape and then begins to execute that plan. There are multiple substages in PCC which represent the emotional ups and downs that an individual will face before reaching Conscious Competence.

04(b) - CONSCIOUS COMPETENCE (CC) - once we reach the final emotional stage of Success and Fulfillment (SF), we can now be confident in who we are and what we bring to the world. In the CC stage we are aware of our pursuit towards out goal of excellence, we have emotionally processed our incompetence and are actively engaged in growth towards excellence. Excellence has not yet matured, but we’re working hard to reach that desired outcome. Looking back on the example of fitness, CC would look like actively engaging in a fitness plan and seeing consistent results. The plan may still need to be tracked, but we are committed and establishing the healthy habits that lead to excellence.

05 - MATURE UNCONSCIOUS COMPETENCE (MUC) - we operate in a program most of our waking hours expressing our unique design with little conscious effort. It is only here that our excellence has become a natural way of life. In the fitness analogy, this stage represents the achievement of goals and a changed perception of life. A person who has reached this stage will have formed habits that effectively continue to perpetuate their goal of excellence.

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It All Starts With A Want

Fri, 13 Nov 2020 14:52:24 GMT

Every journey of excellence begins with a want.

What is a want?

A want is desired destination, a longing for something that I don’t currently possess, or feel that I don’t possess (I may think I don't possess it when I actually do). The dictionary states that a want is a deficiency or lack of something, or a desire for something.

I believe a want is a signal telling me that there is something about my life that is not yet excellent. It’s a signal of latent excellence, similar to how pain is the body’s signal that something isn’t right. Unfortunately, we get used to pain and surrender to it without knowing what a pain-free life feels like. It’s the same with excellence. We get so used to in-excellence that we surrender to it. This is what is called Uninformed or Unconscious Incompetence .

For example, let’s say I look down at my shoes and realize that I can’t see them like I used to because my shirt sticks out too far. This bothers me. Why? Because I weigh more than I need to for my age and height. My eating habits were established during my Unconscious Incompetence . Now, being Conscious of my Incompetence, I want to lose weight. That's my want.

"We get used to pain and surrender

to it without knowing what a

pain-free life looks like."

This want is a signal that there is something not yet excellent in my life. I must lower my calorie intake over time to reach Conscience Competence . This won’t be easy. I will go through emotional stages and if I do not give up when it gets tough, I will succeed at becoming Competent until it develops into Unconscious Competence - a way of life.

On Purpose

The truth is that we were designed on purpose for a purpose. Fulfilling that purpose means expressing this purposeful design. However, when I'm not expressing that purpose, I have a desire. I long for something. I search for it. I grasp at options hoping they will satisfy. What does a want show me? That Excellence is not yet present. It is through Excellence that I reach the fullest expression of my unique, God-given design.

Action Step

Identify an Unconscious Incompetence in your own life.
Identify your goal (want) or Conscious Incompetence .
Grow your Competence in that area until it becomes Conscious Competence – a new way of life.

Note: The terms Unconscious Incompetence, Conscious Incompetence, Conscious Competence, and Unconscious Competence were from what I picked up from the book by James Clear entitled, Atomic Habits (which has been #1 or #2 on the New York Times Bestselling list for all of 2020.)

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How To Become Mediocre

Thu, 12 Nov 2020 16:19:32 GMT

It doesn't take much, but it means much

"Scott... Scott... Hello, Scott"

Suddenly jerked from my daydream, I finally respond, "I'm sorry, you were saying?..."

It happens to everyone of us from time to time. We "zone out", daydream, go into the staring stage. Essentially, we lose focus in the moment. I suppose it's quite acceptable now and then. But for those of us pursuing the fullest expression of our unique, God-given design, focus is a must.

Excellence is being focused. Focus is being excellent. When you focus deeply on the task at hand, you express your unique design right there and then. So what is focus?

Cal Newport, in his book, Deep Work, explains it pretty well:

" Deep work is the ability to focus without distraction on a cognitively demanding task. It’s a skill that allows you to quickly master complicated information and produce better results in less time. Deep work will make you better at what you do and provide the sense of true fulfillment that comes from craftsmanship. In short, deep work is like a super power in our increasingly competitive twenty-first century economy ."

And yet, there is a tremendous shortage of deep work. "... most people have lost the ability to go deep," says Newport, "spending their days instead in a frantic blur of e-mail and social media, not even realizing there’s a better way."

If you want to be mediocre, refrain from deep work. Stay away from focus. If you want to be excellent, deep work and focus is a staple discipline.

Nina Semczuk wrote about 5 practices of deep work in her article on Medium . They are:

Distance yourself from social media .
Give yourself a strict period of time to spend working.
Use commutes, exercise, cleaning or other repetitive tasks to work out concepts.
Prioritize with the 4DX Framework.
Notice your shallow work to better avoid it.

Read her full article as she goes deep (no pun intended) on each of the 5 practices. I want to focus on what I believe is the bane of excellence: social media.

Distance yourself from social media . How often do you check your notifications on your mobile? I bet you do it quite frequently. Those little red numbers in the upper right corner of the apps are taunting you saying, " Open me up, I've got something new for you! " And what about the " ding! " that you hear as each email message or text or... you name it hits your phone?

Here's the most destructive thing. Even when you don't hear it, you have trained your brain to be on the lookout for it. So you are never really in the moment at any point. So when you separate yourself from all of it, your brain can relax.

Social media lulls us into mediocrity

and distances us from any chance

of becoming excellent.

The Social Dilemma is a movie that is quite eye-opening. It reveals that when you engage on a free platform, YOU become the product. Every like, follow, article read, etc. you make you are telling the system what you want to see more of. On the surface, this sounds reasonable. But it's killing excellence. First, because you want to be validated, every thing you end up seeing is what you agree with. That's intoxicating. Second, because you're getting what you like in your newsfeed, you aren't able to engage in deep work like suspending judgment, looking at opposing views with an open mind.

If you're serious about becoming the fullest extent of your unique, God-given design, you will have to beat social media.

ACTION STEP

Create your own personal "Deep Zone".
Put a time on the calendar for a daily appointment in your "DZ" for the express purpose of reflecting on life.
This space must be free of all distractions. Every mobile, tablet, laptop, etc. must be turned off and in a completely different room. *by the way, turn them all off. The physical act of doing so signals to your brain that you're serious about your DZ)
Start with 10 minutes and build from there. I suggest getting to at least 30 minutes in the morning and evening.

Are you interested in joining me in a 4-week challenge? Email me and reference this blog post.

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Your Intrinsic Edge

Wed, 11 Nov 2020 14:14:25 GMT

The cords of remarkable results

There is an article I found extremely insightful as I research The Art Of Excellence . It's written by Dr. Brian Davidson entitled " Unraveling Human Excellence ". I encourage you to give it a read. Dr. Davidson explains excellence like the 3 strands of a cord or rope. He asks the question, "Why do some people achieve remarkable results?" and makes the case that they have what he calls the "Intrinsic Edge" - where non-cognitive skills (factors we all intrinsically possess) are developed, giving us the competitive edge to achieve high performance.

I was particularly interested in the word, "intrinsic". The factors we already possess. Sounds a lot like our unique, God-given design, doesn't it?

Here are the notes from my backstage where I am building out the body of knowledge called, " The Art Of Excellence " which you are free to visit and contribute:

The Intrinsic Edge

Three strands:
Fire
Extremely self-motivated as you work toward your goals with remarkable levels of passion and drive
It's the fire from within
Characteristics
Self-awareness - accurate understanding and appreciation of our authentic self
Self-determination - having and pursuing self-generated and very meaningful goals that align with your values and sense of purpose
Growth mindset - the belief that your potential can be cultivated through effort
Self-efficacy - the belief in your ability to accomplish your goals
Discipline
The ability to follow through and finish the self-generated goals and accomplish them
Characteristics:
Grit - the passion and perseverance to remain committed to the long-term goals
Self-discipline - the ability to engage in deliberate practice and do the work we simply don't want to do
Conscientiousness - being organized, careful, and dependable in the completion of our work
Self-control - the ability to control our impulses and delay gratification for a larger, future reward
Control
The ability to adapt to changing situations and overcome adversity when it strikes.
Knowing how important it is to modify and adapt to change.
Characteristics:
Adaptability - the ability to acclimate to a changing environment
Situational awareness - being cognizant of your surroundings in order to harness new opportunities when they arise
Hope - the ability to actively pursue your goals while maintaining the ability to navigate around obstacles
Resiliency - the ability to bounce back from setbacks and emerge from adversity stronger than before

The seal holding the strands
Honesty - being truthful and trustworthy
Integrity - doing the right thing, even when no one is watching
Ethical behavior - doing good and doing no harm

Now, what makes this list of 3 strands (and the seal) unique is how you see yourself with these characteristics. We can all be high performing in our own way and that's the key: in our own way.

ACTION STEP

Review the notes above
Journal about how you see yourself with each of the 3 strands and their characteristics.
Ask yourself how well you are with the seal of honesty, integrity, and ethical behavior

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What Is A Design?

Tue, 10 Nov 2020 16:15:54 GMT

The purpose of your design is the purpose of your design

According to Wikipedia , design is defined as, "A plan or specification for the construction of an object or system or for the implementation of an activity or process, or the result of that plan or specification in the form of a prototype, product or process. The verb to design expresses the process of developing a design."

I want to pull out a phrase that is appropriate to our discussion of design in terms of The Art Of Excellence . That phrase is:

" ...for the implementation of... "

This is the object of the design itself. It's the end game, the final result, the purpose, the why. We cannot begin to define design unless there is a purpose behind it. As I was talking with a client the other day, we were remarking about how powerful it is when every action of an organization can be tied back to the mission. Everything makes sense. It's easier to gauge how successful you are.

You are a unique design. Even though you may resemble another person with the number of eyes, a nose, 10 fingers and toes, you are still quite unique. Here are the main components of your design in the context of The Art Of Excellence :

Your Passion . This is your drive. It's what motivates you from within. It's what you care about. It's what makes you come alive. It's what makes your heart sing. It can be made of a lot of different triggers. You may love puppies and sunsets and helping the homeless find a home. It's as unique as your fingerprint.

Your Personality . This is how you view the world. There are a multitude of personality assessments available to begin to get a handle on where you are on the "spectrum" of personality. But watch out that they don't label you. That said, there are 2 main continuums on which you will likely fall. The first is PEOPLE VERSUS TASK, and FAST VERSUS METHODICAL. There are people-fast (these are the party animals) which we will call Otters, playful and upbeat most of the time. There are people-methodical (these are the counselors) which we will call Golden Retrievers, caring and empathetic. There are task-fact (these are the leaders of orgs) which we will call Lions, go-getting entrepreneurs. And lastly, there are task-methodical (these are the CPA and actuaries) which we will call Beavers, who are "busy as a beaver".

Your Proficiency . This is the accumulation of abilities that you have been given by birth or learned through education or experience. When you are engaged in a proficiency, time flies by and it's hard to explain to another person how to do what you do so well because it comes so naturally to you.

Be careful not to confuse your design with the purpose of your design. The aim is not to follow your passion, personality, and proficiency. If you do, you enter what is known as the "comfort zone". The aim is to follow your passion, personality, and proficiency for the purpose of a higher calling. More about that in a later post.

ACTION STEP

Pick one or more of the following:

List what you're passionate about
Determine where you are on the people-task continuum and the fast-methodical continuum
List all your proficiencies, what comes naturally, what you've learned by education, and what you've developed through experience

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What Happens When There Is No Excellence?

Mon, 09 Nov 2020 14:17:39 GMT

"Only through focus can you do world-class things, no matter how capable you are." Bill Gates

What happens when excellence is not developing in your life? The result is potentially devastating. I will show you what I mean. Let's start with a statement:

The journey of excellence begins with a want.

A want is an indication of a latent excellence waiting to be released in your life. If you want something, it means that either the object of your want is necessary for your excellence, or whatever that want is pointing to is necessary for your excellence. Here's an example I Want An iPad :

Let's say you want an iPad. You think your life would be excellent if you could only use an iPad to organize all your stuff, perhaps go all digital, and not have to carry all those books and notes with you.

The iPad is the object of your want. Do you really need the iPad? Maybe, maybe not. Maybe it's the fact that you like to be productive. Being productive equals excellent for you. When you're more productive, you're more profitable. You learn quicker. You develop in your job and establish job security. Ahh, now we're talking excellence. It's not the iPad. It's what the iPad represents that is the latent excellence. You need to be more productive.

In this example, the iPad acts as a rocket booster. It got you into the orbit you needed to be in to understand the real latent excellence, but it drops off once it serves its purpose.

UnExcellence

So I've established that a want, any want, is an indication of latent excellence. There are a few options to handling a want:

You can ignore it. This leads to a life of mediocrity. You end up living life by default, not by design.
You can cling to it. This leads to a potentially unhealthy relationship with things. Especially if it's a rocket booster want and not a real want.
You can learn from it. This is the better way. If you can increase your understanding of yourself with every want, whether it's a legit want or a rocket booster want, you are on the journey of excellence.

So, the big problem I want to highlight for you here comes from Option 1, ignoring wants.

When you ignore your wants, you learn to live with unhappiness and unfulfillment. Over time, you accumulate years of living by default. You take whatever comes your way and react to it as though the locus of control is outside of you (you're being controlled) rather than inside you. A life by default is further intensified in a world of extreme marketing. If you're not aware of your wants and learn from those wants, you are victim to marketing efforts that exploit your wants. This is life by default and it is devastating. Why devastating? Let's look at the regrets of the elderly who are about to die.

Bronnie Ware has done an incredible job chronicling the regrets of the dying. One such regret I want to focus on here is this:

"I wish I had been more true to myself instead of the person others expected me to be."

This is tragic. Fast forward to your 95th year of life. You're lying in your bed and all you can say as you look back on your life is, "I wish I hadn't lived a life others expected of me." All those wasted years, wasted opportunities, wasted fulfillment, wasted impact.

Unexcellence never ends well.

ACTION STEPS

List 10 things about you
Ask a close friend to list 10 things about you
Compare lists, and see if there is any area of life you're living just to please others

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Excellence Is Submission

Sun, 08 Nov 2020 16:50:23 GMT

Excellence is upside down

There is a little known but powerful principle I don't want you to lose sight of. If you don't capture this, all your efforts at becoming the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design will be off.

The minute you learn something, you are in danger of what is called the "curse of knowledge". Unless you repel it, this curse will lead you down a road of artificial royalty (the erroneous assumption that you are the thought leader). You will become certain about this knowledge to such a degree that you become closed to any other considerations on the matter. And that stunts your growth.

It can also be destructive if you're not careful. There is an urban legend about an encounter a battle ship captain had with another ship (or so he thought):

His battle ship was on exercise at sea in bad weather. He was on the bridge. It was foggy. Just after dark the look out spotted a light on the starboard side. The captain asked if it was steady or moving. The look out replied the light was steady meaning they were on direct collision course with that ship! The captain ordered the lookout signal to the other ship:

“Change course 20 degrees. We are on collision course.”

The signal came back ‘”Advisable for you to change course.”

The captain signaled ‘”I am a captain. Change course 20 degrees.”

“I am a seaman second class. You had better change course 20 degrees” came the reply.

The captain was furious. He sent back ‘”I am a battleship. Change course!”

Back came the signal, “I am a lighthouse. Your call.”

BECOME A STUDENT

The key to repelling this curse is not what you would normally think. It involves submission. It involves adopting the posture of a student. This is the the action of accepting or yielding to a superior force or to the will or authority of another person. You acknowledge you are not an expert. Even though you can have certainty, you can still keep the door cracked for more information.

Susanna Newsonen writes about being a student of life in her blog post ( CLICK HERE TO READ ). She lists 7 benefits:

Be open minded. An open, positive mindset improves your overall happiness.
Learn something new everyday. Cherish all the different aspects of life that exist.
Do something you’re afraid of. Courage gives you a real high and positive confidence for the future.
Stay hungry for more. Set ambitious goals. You’re happiest when you’re growing.
Take things lightly. When you take things less seriously, you’re much more bound to have fun.
Remain curious. Always. You’ll find you’ll discover a whole new, exciting world behind curiosity.
Reflect on what’s happening in your life. Knowing how you feel helps you make future decisions that will boost your happiness.

ACTION STEP

Take the hardest item from the list of 7 above that is the hardest for you to start doing
Commit to doing it for 7 days
At the end of the 7 days, write in a journal what you learned about yourself and your world
Incorporate that learning into your journey of excellence

Plowing The Soil With Excellence

Sat, 07 Nov 2020 20:33:35 GMT

Look at your journey of excellence (becoming the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design) like plowing a field. There are 3 basic points:

The soil is hard
The plow is capable
The adjustment makes the difference

The Soil Is Hard

Life is not always easy. You experience difficulty to one degree or another. Some have extreme difficulty in countries where basic necessities are a struggle. COVID-19 introduced a totally different layer of complexity and difficulty upon us all.

The Plow Is Capable

T he moment you were conceived, you were given a force of energy. That energy is the plow you possess. It is unique. You are able to get your arms around this mysterious energy by things like personality profiles such as the DiSC, Meyers-Briggs, Strengthsfinder. You can engage in therapy or discussions with others. As you grow, you become more aware of this energy and the good, and harm, it can do. Essentially, the plow is our unique, God-given design. The plow is capable. You are capable.

The Adjustment Makes The Difference

There are two types of plow positions: Inappropriate and appropriate

When you try to plow the soil of difficulty inappropriately, you try to be someone else and not yourself. You try do things you aren't good at. You try to respond in ways that aren't truly your passion. This results in frustration, chronic imbalance, being out of rhythm, strained relationships, financial struggles, a sense of aloneness in the universe, poor health, low productivity, and out of control emotions.

But when you plow the soil of difficulty appropriately, you are being true to who you were meant to be. You hone the gifts and abilities you already possess. You remain curious, humble, and open to adjustment when necessary. This results in fulfillment, proper life rhythm, enjoyment, deep, meaningful relationships, financial stability, feeling of rightness in the universe, better health, high productivity, and emotional intelligence.

ACTION STEP

How are you plowing your soil?
Think of a time when you plowed inappropriately. What were the results?
Think of a time when you plowed appropriately. What were those results?

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Excellence And Control

Sat, 07 Nov 2020 12:30:23 GMT

Control is a paradox

Ever feel like you were not in control of what was happening to you? Have you ever lost your cool and lashed out at someone? Yeah, me too. It comes primarily from the sense that you are being controlled. It's like change. You might think that no one likes change. However, it's not that we don't like change so much that we don't like being changed. Similarly, we don't like being controlled.

When you are feeling controlled, the locus of control is outside of you. You don't feel like you have any choice in the matter. You feel like you are a slave to circumstances. But there is an excellent way of living in the midst of circumstances.

Excellence And Control

You've probably heard the old phrase, "It's not what happens to us that matters, it's how we respond to what happens that matters." That's a pretty good perspective to have as an excellent person. You have a choice for how you respond to what comes your way. Compare it to reacting to circumstances out of a sense of being controlled.

An example:

Let's say you've had a bad day. You spilled jelly on your shirt at breakfast. Changing your shirt made you late for work. When you finally arrived, your boss gave you "that look" that made you wonder all day if you'd be passed over for that promotion you've been hoping for.

Now, you can react to this set of circumstances by bottling up everything and kicking the dog or being short with the kids when you get home. Or you can respond out of a sense of control, which looks quite differently. You agree that mistakes happen and the jelly didn't jump onto your shirt on purpose. You take the initiative to go to your boss and have a conversation about your tardiness. And you come home with open arms to greet your kids, and your dog.

I have a lot more to say about the role that control has over our journey of excellence, but for now here's an action step to consider:

ACTION STEP

Make a list of things that happened to you over the last week
Separate the things you caused from the things you didn't cause
Reflect on your response to both lists and see how much control you feel you have

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It's Not About Your Comfort

Thu, 05 Nov 2020 12:10:04 GMT

Comfort is a dead end street.

As you become the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design (aka become excellent), you will find yourself in "the zone". I call that your Zone Of Excellence (ZOE). The idea is to get as close to the center of this zone as possible for an atomic impact for good in your world. In fact, I wrote a booklet as a high-level overview of getting to your ZOE. You'll find it here.

But the center of the zone is not synonymous with what you and I know as the "comfort zone".

In the ZOE, you are pursuing excellence with an open, or outward, mindset. In the comfort zone, you are pursing excellence with a closed, or inward, mindset. With ZOE, its about adding value to others. With comfort, it's all about you.

To help understand the difference in these mindsets, I point you to the incredible work by the Arbinger Institute . They define an outward mindset as, "seeing others as people who matter like you do. You take into account their needs, challenges, and objectives. And you focus on collective results."

Please understand that your pursuit to the center of your Zone Of Excellence is not a journey to your comfort zone. On the contrary, one of the hallmarks of an excellent person is how great an impact he/she is having on their sphere of influence. Having a great impact leads to a great legacy where the improvement of others' lives continues long after you've passed on.

Therefore, your mindset is the key to the difference between Excellence versus Comfortable.

I'd be interested in your thoughts on this matter.

ACTION STEP

Find a populated place (which may be a bit more challenging in the pandemic, but not impossible).
Find a bench to sit on.
Observe people. Every person you notice, think to yourself, " That person is priceless. They are a bundle of passion, personality, and proficiency. They can, in fact, make an incredible difference in others' lives. "

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Excellence Is Not Perfection

Wed, 04 Nov 2020 13:03:43 GMT

What is and isn't attainable

You want things to go right, no? So do I. I suppose we all have a little perfectionist tendencies in our bones. Let me draw a distinction between perfectionism and excellence. I believe it is important to understand before we embark on this journey of excellence much further.

Perfection means having it all together and never making mistakes. Perfectionists are never content, therefore are never happy. Those who interact with perfectionists do not enjoy being around them because they are always frustrated. They are frustrated because they can't quite seem to reach it. They are trying to get what cannot be gotten. They are constantly seeking a mirage.

Just this morning, my wife asked me what was wrong with me. I said nothing was wrong. And then I realized it. I had been irritable at the dog and her. It was because I wanted my business to be running on all cylinders and I still have a long way to go. I was leaning into perfectionism and it resulted in irritability to the point that my wife noticed it (my dog may have too but she doesn't say much.)

A person of excellence on the other hand accepts the fact that perfection is not possible. It is the mindset of continual growth and learning and changing as new information reveals the "unconscious incompetence" we've been blind to up to the point of the new knowledge. Excellence is not just acknowledging the new-found incompetence, but does something about it and doesn't rest until unconscious competence has been reached in that new area.

Perfection is not attainable. Excellence is therefore not a destination, but a way of life. It involves succeeding, failing, learning, and evolving. I will also add that excellence, based on this understanding, is undeniably attainable right now, today in your life and mine.

ACTION STEP

Find a quite place to sit down, uninterrupted.
Reflect on your life using these 6 lenses:
Spiritual
Relational
Financial
Emotional
Physical
Vocational
In what area(s) are you frustrated? Could that frustration be a result of unrealistic expectations of perfection?

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What Others Think

Tue, 03 Nov 2020 13:14:40 GMT

It doesn't matter. And it does.

They say that when the elderly are about to experience death, they reflect. ( side note: don't you think it's better to reflect all through the journey, not just at the end ?) Upon reflection, they wish they had been more true to who they were and not what others expected of them. Hmmm, this is interesting. Let's stay with that thought for a moment.

Isn't it interesting how creative we get when faced with a constraint? I was asked to post 40 videos on TikTok for their educational effort. Each video was to be no longer than 15 seconds and it had to be educational. At first, I thought "how in the world will I ever do this?" Then, after a lot of trial and error, I started to get into the groove. I had to be much more creative. It was the imposed constraint that brought me to a place of thinking differently.

Others: Limitation and Insight

They are a sort of constraint on us. They are sources of great insight. They are also sources of limitation on what we were designed to become. But it's not their fault, necessarily. It's ours. I was once told that we teach others how to treat us. It's true.

Others are a source of limitation when we surrender to how they think we should look or act. I think this aspect of others is what the dying think when they share their regrets. They lament at the lost potential, the unused resources, the lost time. So, yes, I think it's best not to succumb to others' demands on us and how we should live our lives. But...

Others are a source of insight. They keep us from falling off the path too far. They show us contrast from which we can see our uniqueness. If you are an introvert-type person, when you witness a very outgoing person, you are reminded how you don't like being that way. It supports your core feelings and beliefs about yourself. Likewise, if you're outgoing and love being with people, when you hear of the introvert who gets energy from being alone for hours, you cringe.

These differences, these pieces of feedback give us the insight we need to navigate the expression of our unique, God-given design. Provided, that is, if we don't go too far and become who others think we should be.

Your Design

Excellence is not about being like other people. It's about being who you were supposed to be. Your design, your emotional mix, your interests, your passions, your likes, your dislikes. So here's the balance I think you and I must strike when becoming excellent:

Look to others to appreciate the contrast and heed the seeds of wisdom in their demands that you be like how they want you to be.

Interact with others and be yourself in the process.

Here's are a couple articles you might find helpful as you continue on your journey of excellence:

photo cred

Why Excellence

Mon, 02 Nov 2020 15:22:48 GMT

If I could only be excellent.

The photo is my mug. I want you to see this upon my first blog post on excellence. You can see I'm not perfect. My teeth are crooked, I'm bald, and I have a crooked smile. I'm the perfect illustration of imperfection and yet, I want to be excellent. I have a suspicion that excellence and perfection are not quite the same.

Welcome to the first blog of 365 blog posts on Excellence. Grab a cup of coffee and converse with me. Let's go.

Why am I devoting the balance of my life to exploring excellence? That's a good question. I'll begin by telling you that as I write this blog post (the first of 365 I am going to write over the next year), I am 55, soon to be 56 years old.

If you've ever reached a point in your life when the days behind you out number the days ahead, you'll know what I'm about to say. I don't have much time left. I want to make a difference. I want to make someone's life better because I was created to live for so many years on earth.

Mortality? Yes, that's it. I'm facing my mortality. I'm seeing that there is not much time left and even today could be my only blog post on the subject and God takes me home today. THAT'S why I'm devoting the rest of my life to the study and understanding of excellence.

A Working Definition of Excellence

What is excellence? Here's the working definition I will be starting out with:

"Becoming the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design."

That's what we will be using for the time being. I can't think of a better definition right now. Of course, I'm open to your ideas and thoughts (comment below). Here's how I break this down:

" becoming " - this implies that we will never fully reach pure excellence in this life. We are fallible and we exist in a fallible world. That's why I use an "ing" word. It's the becomING, not the beCOME that's key.

" the fullest expression " - this means the fullest we can possibly be. This is our zone. This is when we are firing on all cylinders and we acknowledge our gifts and see them being played out in the appropriate context.

" unique " - this means there is no one else like you. I have a lot more to say about this but I'll leave it at that for now.

" God-given " - I believe in God. I believe that he send his son to earth to redeem us from our wickedness. It's how I was raised and it's what I've chosen to believe. You may not believe as I do, which is fine. Unless you have a good argument to the contrary, don't research the unbelievable mystery of the human body and the vastness of the galaxies and tell me there isn't a more intelligent being who is our Creator.

" design " - this refers to all the pieces and parts of who we are as individuals. Personality, passions, wants, desires, dislikes, skills, and anything else you can use to describe us.

That's enough for today. Stay tuned for more.

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From The Porch

Managing Business Owner Expectations During Exit Planning

The success of a business exit hinges not on the numbers alone but on the alignment of expectations, values, and vision for what comes next.

Managing Client Expectations

Opportunities in Retirement

Shaping a Retirement Vision

Conclusion

The Advisor’s Role in Easing Fear of Regret

"In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take." – Lewis Carroll

This Trips Up Most People - Brace Yourself

How to Finally Stop Hitting the Reset Button

﻿ on Your Life Strategy

The Cycle That Keeps You Stuck

Willpower Won’t Get You There

Stop Waiting for the Right Time

How to Finally Follow Through

Let’s Get Real

The Perfect Exit (or not)

Is there a perfect exit?

Detect Conflict Early

For The Advisor:

How To Detect Early Signs Of Conflict

For a smoother exit planning process

A Tale About Life Beyond The Retirement Date

Three Key Takeaways for Advisors from Charlie's Story

Help Clients Envision Life After Retirement

Emphasize Planning Beyond Finances

Encourage Gradual Transitions

How To Say "No" Without Offending Others

1. Be Direct, but Polite

2. Offer an Alternative

3. Blame Your Priorities

4. Delay Your Response

5. Use Humor to Deflect

25 Ways To Express Gratitude

The Strategic Power of Gratitude

Fathers and Sons During Succession Planning

Father-Son Conflict in Succession Planning:

A Comprehensive Guide to Achieving Successful Outcomes

Common Sources of Father-Son Conflict in Succession Planning

Step-by-Step Guide to Achieving a Successful Succession

References

Understanding the Emotion of Conflict During Exit Planning for Business Owners

CONFLICT

How to Help Clients Overcome the Fear of Making the Wrong Exit Decision

How to Help Clients Overcome the Fear of Making the Wrong Exit Decision

1. Help Clients Clarify Their Values

2. Define Specific Exit Goals

3. Provide Scenario Planning and Projections

4. Encourage a Phased or Gradual Exit

5. Reinforce Decision-Making as an Ongoing Process

6. Highlight Their Past Success in Decision-Making

7. Normalize the Fear and Build Support

Conclusion

Regrets Of The Famous

Oprah Winfrey

Michael Jordan

J.K. Rowling

Steve Jobs

Robert Downey Jr.

Finding Purpose Beyond Profit

Hallmark: Spiritually Anchored

This one action will help you in many ways

This one action will create a huge return.

Why Does Serving Strong Exist?

The Why, How, and What

WHY

HOW

WHAT

The Rudder

In the lake called life, it's the rudder that matters.

Full Expression

This is a subtitle for your new post

The Art of Excellence

Excellence is not a goal to be achieved, but a life to be lived.

The Ups and Downs of Excellence

This journey is not for the faint of heart.

3 Signs Of Personal Excellence

Live more today. Regret less tomorrow.

"Excellence is the act of becoming the fullest expression of your unique, God-given design."

on Your Life Strategy