What Others Think
It doesn't matter. And it does.
They say that when the elderly are about to experience death, they reflect. ( side note: don't you think it's better to reflect all through the journey, not just at the end?) Upon reflection, they wish they had been more true to who they were and not what others expected of them. Hmmm, this is interesting. Let's stay with that thought for a moment.
Isn't it interesting how creative we get when faced with a constraint? I was asked to post 40 videos on TikTok for their educational effort. Each video was to be no longer than 15 seconds and it had to be educational. At first, I thought "how in the world will I ever do this?" Then, after a lot of trial and error, I started to get into the groove. I had to be much more creative. It was the imposed constraint that brought me to a place of thinking differently.
Others: Limitation and Insight
They are a sort of constraint on us. They are sources of great insight. They are also sources of limitation on what we were designed to become. But it's not their fault, necessarily. It's ours. I was once told that we teach others how to treat us. It's true.
Others are a source of limitation when we surrender to how they think we should look or act. I think this aspect of others is what the dying think when they share their regrets. They lament at the lost potential, the unused resources, the lost time. So, yes, I think it's best not to succumb to others' demands on us and how we should live our lives. But...
Others are a source of insight. They keep us from falling off the path too far. They show us contrast from which we can see our uniqueness. If you are an introvert-type person, when you witness a very outgoing person, you are reminded how you don't like being that way. It supports your core feelings and beliefs about yourself. Likewise, if you're outgoing and love being with people, when you hear of the introvert who gets energy from being alone for hours, you cringe.
These differences, these pieces of feedback give us the insight we need to navigate the expression of our unique, God-given design. Provided, that is, if we don't go too far and become who others think we should be.
Your Design
Excellence is not about being like other people. It's about being who you were supposed to be. Your design, your emotional mix, your interests, your passions, your likes, your dislikes. So here's the balance I think you and I must strike when becoming excellent:
Look to others to appreciate the contrast and heed the seeds of wisdom in their demands that you be like how they want you to be.
Interact with others and be yourself in the process.
Here's are a couple articles you might find helpful as you continue on your journey of excellence:
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